The Horror That Lies Within

My mini-van is like our mobile home.

We eat, sleep, watch movies, travel, communicate, make decisions-and much more, in our home-away-from-home.
We are going to Grandpa and Grandma’s farm for Memorial Day.
It is time to clean out the van.  You didn’t see it, but I just shuttered.
I will spare you pictures.  Because dried food and nastiness is so easy to visualize, isn’t it? You’ve got a mental picture, right now.  See?  
You’re welcome.
Here’s what I cleaned out of my vehicle:
  • Portable high chair, featuring 4 dried food varieties
  • 2 Hot Wheels cars
  • a McDonald’s Happy Meal treasure
  • 3 pictures of my first-born, from 3 years ago
  • 19 cheerios
  • 8 goldfish crackers
  • numerous candy wrappers
  • pieces of a popped balloon
  • 2 books
  • one clean diaper
  • one pair of underwear (none of your business who’s)
  • a dirty sock
  • 4 hair clippies
  • one hair bow
  • an empty Capri Sun
  • a dried-up strawberry fruit snack
  • 5 game pieces from travel monopoly
  • one french fry from 2004
  • 1,000,000 crumbs
To read about other disgusting things found in people’s cars, so you don’t feel so alone and ashamed, visit Rocks in My Dryer for her What’s in Your Car Carnival?


  1. 2


    don’t hate me. my husband keeps my car clean and gas in my tank. i know i am a freak of nature because i haven’t pumped gas since 1989 (but i do know how thank you very much).

  2. 3


    It’s a sign that you’re a mom. My MIL drives me crazy with her constantly clean van, and snide remarks that mine isn’t. Hello? We transport 4 kids and many dogs everywhere we go!

  3. 6


    I have an idea….
    2 moms, the Nokia Center…
    2 vans…who would be crowned
    Yeah, I’m gonna TRASH talk..
    I have MORE than that in mine….unloaded it on the DRIVEWAY..(yep, spend a lot of time on that driveway!)

    one big pile….even the people were amazed…we could live for WEEKS!!

    I’d call it “Throwdown….” but an appropriate host….hmmmmmmm….

    maybe some virtual guy…they can do alot with virtual people I hear….:) HA! I crack myself up when I’m delerious!!

    You have a great one!!

  4. 9


    That sounds like my van when I was allowed to drive it. You couldn’t pay me enough to drive in Jakarta traffic so we have a driver (how weird is my life???) who not only drives us where ever we want to go but washes the van EVERY SINGLE DAY EVEN IF IT IS RAINS! He also vacuums and keeps the inside- including 3 car/booster seats- spotlessly clean. Sadly we are going to Germany where yours truly will be the driver, which means back to crushed cheerios, ancient french fries, toys and books all over the place. I’m gonna miss having a clean van but not enough to actually clean it myself.

  5. 10


    I’m taking Short Stuff out to my mom’s farm this weekend too, so I already did the car cleanup. My husband’s car cleanups are always the scarieiest, however… you just don’t know what you’re going to find.

  6. 12


    Nothing like asking your daughter what she is eating when you know you haven’t hit the drive through in days, eh?

    Petrified chicken nuggets are a frequent flier in our car.

    Thanks for the laughs…I still might find that earring back if I look hard enough.

    The Maid

  7. 13


    Oh I remember those days!!!
    When we bought the Yukon, Patrick has FORBADE us to eat in it.

    WELLLLLL, since he’s very rarely in residence, we do- eat in it. I love In and Out Fries.

    BUT, we have learned to dispose of the evidence, including the greasy fingerprints, (we watch a lot of CSI!)

    Even Madison knows to take all the trash and crumbs with her- she doesn’t want the wrath brought down on her either! (plus she loves the fries, too)

  8. 14


    hahaha alone and ashamed is spot on! i am glad i’m not the only one! just the thought of the crumbs in the cracks of the seats of my minivan are making me gag at this moment!

    i love how you called it a happy meal “treasure” hahaha

  9. 17


    I’m impressed you could keep a list. I think I’d lose track before I was even halfway though. I know that my sewing machine is still in my trunk (I really will get it fixed one of these days) along with about half of LP’s wardrobe from last summer, maybe 4 pairs of shoes and who knows what else.

  10. 18


    That is so weird! I was reading this finally cause I have actually had to ya know work today, and as I reading I thought Oh someone needs to do a blog carnival on whats in your car. Then low and behold there it is. :)

  11. 20


    I thought briefly about participating in this… until I walked out and looked through the window into my van. The thought vanished. We’re not travelling anywhere far this weekend, so I can continue to close my eyes and ignore the back 2/3 of my van. and breathe through my mouth.

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