When Bloggers Don’t Blog

I jumped into the blog community this time last year. 
My blog was unknown and mostly unread.
There were a few people who believed in me from the beginning:  my first commenters. 
Strangers, who made my day.
And nearly every one of the blogs who welcomed me into this community and made me feel loved, have stopped blogging. 
There are different reasons, some I know, others I don’t. I stay in contact with a couple through email, but others have deleted their blogs and I haven’t heard a word.
It’s like a friend moved away.
Which feels strange, just typing those words. How can I miss people I’ve never met in real life or spoken to in person? 
I just experienced my first blogging conference where I put faces with names. It makes it all more real. Because (news flash) REAL people write blogs!
I’ve been thinking about why bloggers stop blogging. Do they run out of words because they’ve said it all? Are they compromised in some way?  Too busy? Or just simply burned out from too much of an online life? There are probably a million different reasons.
If you blog, please remember that your words are powerful. They are read. The good and the bad. And when you leave this parallel world, you are missed.
I know many bloggers stop out of disappointment or because they don’t feel their blog is successful. 
I think this is why commenting is so important. It’s not about receiving a hundred comments a day, it’s about the affirmation, the companionship that you receive. I make it a point to comment on several new blogs every week. Someone I don’t know, never heard of, because I want to be someone’s first commenter. 
Why do you blog? Do you ever want to stop? 
I have to say, I hope I’m never done.
(I know many of my readers do not have a blog, but I’m still very glad you’re a part of my world. How would you feel if you clicked to your favorite blog and it was gone?)



Comments

  1. says

    I took a blogging hiatus, then missed it too much and my wonderful hubby re-created every word from his RSS feeder. I left because I had some old “friends” who were bordering on stalking. So when I came back I made my blog private.

    I think it’s easy to get burned out when every word is being scrutinized.

  2. says

    I was wondering just the other day if my readers would miss me if I just disappeared. If something happened to me my husband wouldn’t know how to let all of my readers know. I hope to blog my entire life. Great post!

  3. says

    Girl, are you talking to me? I certainly hope so. I stopped blogging for a few reasons. I really had thoughts of grandeur and figured I would be wildly popular. I was not.

    I felt I didn’t have a focus really and I wondered if the funny stories I was writing about my family would one day embarrass them. I chose to be anonymous because I didn’t want anyone in my real life to know I had such thoughts, struggles, mood swings. That’s not the type of authentic person I want to be. I’m trying to focus more on God and becoming a better person and I don’t know if that’s for sharing.

    I have such few boundaries with blogging. It became a complete time suck. Blog. Twitter. Facebook. I used it as an escapism. I kept reading more and more people. People who were just so dang good. Better.

    Also, Little Professor is really struggling and is a huge focus of my mental capacity and although I want to write about it just to get it out of my head, I don’t think that would be fair to him.

    And did I mention that I am having huge baby bangs? Actually child bangs. We started looking into fostering, then adoption, then international adoption. Because now that I don’t blog, I can expand my family.

    Truly, I’m crazy. See why I can’t still blog?

    I miss you, too. (If you weren’t talking about me, I feel like a total idiot.)

  4. says

    I blog to get out what is going on in my head…..(scary place sometimes, lol)….or something that is weighing on my heart. Most of the time it is to reflect on God and what He is doing in my life. Sometimes, it’s just to laugh at myself….

    I don’t have a timeline in mind….I hope I am filled with things to talk about for a long time.

  5. says

    I too have seen some of my favorite blogs simple stop updating or disappear. I started blogging to keep in touch with family and friends back home in TX when my husband took a job that sent us overseas. Found out they were maybe the least likely to read my blog. Then it morphed into a creative outlet. The last month I have been in a blogging slump, even thought about just giving up but there are too many days when the community of friends on the internet have saved my sanity. I will keep blogging but I am not sure what my blog will look like in the future. Time will tell.

  6. says

    Who knows why others stop blogging? It could be any reason under the sun but I can completely relate that it leaves you feeling….well, lost and lonely, without a friend. And without an answer. The discontinuance of any relationship is very hard, without a reason, it is doubly difficult. It is like a sudden death. Painful and unanswered. I enjoy blogging and the new world that it has brought me. It motivates my writing, my decorating, my parenting, my spirit. Thank YOU for blogging so well! I love your blog and am quite sure, you would be a good friend too!! :)

  7. says

    I just recently found your blog and I have to say this post was just so true. I have been blogging for about 3 years…started as a way for me just to track my first born and for out of town family….got a little bigger when our 2nd son was diagnosed with a fatal disorder at our 20 week ultrasound and a whole new blogworld opened up to me… now I’m somewhere in between but find blogging to be so therputic and I love my blogworld friends.

    Enjoying your blog.

  8. says

    I started blogging just to get my words and thoughts out. I never really thought that anyone would be too interested in what I have to say. (I am not nearly as interesting as your family!) But I have found that I have a few loyal viewers and a few loyal lurkers (though I sure wish that they would comment!)

    I guess that I will stop when I run out of things to say. Which, knowing me, may never happen!

  9. says

    Honestly, I cannot imagine not blogging. CAN NOT IMAGINE. :-) So I feel the same as you when someone stops blogging.

    And I love that you comment on new blogs every week! I comment on all of the blogs that link in to my carnival and I love getting to know new bloggers that way.

    Meeting you at Blissdom was a highlight! I’m so glad we got to have dinner together.

  10. says

    I love blogging…I love to tell my stories about my family, my life, my idiosyncracies. I hope I never stop, but I have slowed down lately. Just too busy. And somethings gotta give. And it has been the blogging. The upside to that? My house is a little cleaner!

    But I understand feeling like a failure because I don’t get the comments. Then I remind myself that it’s not all about the comments. It’s about touching people in some way–so that they laugh, or cry or learn something. Or just feel like they’re not alone.

    And that’s what I love.

  11. says

    Thanks so much for this post. I happened upon it completely by chance (because I am a blog-scouter-stalker??) and, as a blogger of just a few months, it was very encouraging and inspiring. I am so thrilled when I get a comment or two…I don’t feel as much like I’m chatting up the ether, even though blogging for me is as much of a creative outlet as it is a way to stay connected with people. Sometimes people I know will call me up and personally comment on a post, so I know they’re reading, but there’s really something to be said for the written affirmation.

    Thanks for that–
    hintonrae.wordpress.com

  12. says

    I just took an impromtu bloggy break, but it feels AWESOME being back…like catching up with an old friend over coffee. :)

    I have to remind myself that if I don’t post daily it’s OK!

  13. says

    great post Kristen. I think commenting is a biggie and while I began blogging for fun and to keep family and friends updated on life, I quickly got sucked in and wanted more. I enjoyed browsing through blogs and gaining new friendships. And I even get sad when I don’t receive any comments )C; or wish that I even had more than 4 comments. I never have a desire to quit as I just love connecting with more people around the world.

  14. says

    I blog because it is fun to share my work with others. Unfortunately I do feel like it’s barely read. I will continue to blog, but am amazed by how fast your blog boomed. That’s great!

  15. says

    WOW, you so got it! I often wonder if it’s worth it… I have a few regular commenters, but I know some visit, but leave with nary a word, why?? I can’t read a blog without saying something, anything, just so you know I’ve read what you had to say… keep it up! Now get to answering 168 comments! HA!

  16. says

    Wow, thanks for such a wonderful post! I just started blogging this month and don’t really have a direction yet. I’m so amazed at all the really fantastic blogs out here in this “parallel world”! I just hope I can be one of them someday!

  17. says

    I just happen upon your blog…I check out blogs now and then when I have a free minute. You are so right, there are lots of blogs I look at and don’t comment on…I feel weird…but I would hate to see some of them gone when I click on them. I started blogging last year when I went through a rough patch in my marriage. I didn’t get many visitors so I just quit. Maybe I should start up again…who knows. I just know that I enjoy looking at other blogs and seeing how inspirational they are…just wish I could provide some type of inspiration to others. Thanks for your blog!

  18. says

    I have to say that I began blogging in March of 2004. Then I got married and changed jobs to begin teaching full time, added on grad school and I just didn't have the time to blog anymore. Then I had my son and I am staying home with him and I have picked up blogging again. So sometimes our lives just get to busy to blog about them, unfortunately. Because blogging is a nice way to take some time out and reflect on your life and things that matter. Anyway, I'm sure there are various reasons for stopping & starting.

  19. says

    I blog more for myself than anyone else. Don’t get me wrong, I do LOVE to get comments.

    I don’t think I’ll ever stop, even when it becomes uncool. It’s such a great way for me to put my thoughts in a concrete form.

  20. says

    I started my blog as a way to share my life and the little things that I get to enjoy about my son everyday that our relatives who live far away don’t get to experience. I’m super new to the whole blogging experience, but I LOVE finding a good blog to read, and I’ve thoroughly been enjoying yours. Thanks for the reminder to leave comments. I know I love when I get comments, although mine is more of a family blog. Keep up the good work!

  21. says

    This blog really touched me. I think it’s hard when you feel your voice isn’t being heard. For me, I started my blog as a way to keep writing after I quit my job as a reporter to take care of my son full-time.

    I love to hear advice about how to make a blog get more traffic. Commenting is the perfect piece of advice. Not to mention, hyperlinking and commenting in your own blog about posts on other sites. Keep up the good work. I think we all should share the love and visit one anothers’ sites. Just the comments here alone a great way to start getting to know the blogging community out there.

    Lots of love!

    – Ivy

  22. says

    Hello,

    I just wanted to let you know I’m glad you’re here. I’m a pretty new reader and found your blog from the bloggy giveaway’s carnival (that 100 Land’s End gift card really caught my eye;)

    Anyway, I’ve been reading since then and really enjoy your posts.

    This May is my third blogging anniversary and I can’t imagine stopping anytime soon. I know what you mean about feeling like a friend moved away when other bloggers close up shop.

    Take Care,

    Trixie

  23. says

    I am pretty new to the blogging world- haven’t quite blogged one year. At first I wanted to have a way to show far away family and friends What is up with us/our family but after starting to read other blogs and then starting to post, I am working on getting more depth of myself out there… I have also been truly inspired to really start taking pictures again and have to say I took a break when I broke my last camera before my darling husband bought me a new one.
    I know what you mean about someone who just stops blogging- it is like a friend that leaves and it hurts a little.
    Thanks for the reminder on blogging.

  24. says

    I know I love comments, so I try to comment on all the blogs I visit. :) I hope to be able to keep my blog going for a long time and to still have people stop by and say “hi”. It’s fun to write and document a bit of our world and I have a hope that somewhere along the way I share something that is of value to someone. Whether it be a recipe, a gentle reminder, encouragement, a laugh, an idea, a website link, whatever. And the comments just keep me going. :) Remember to share the comment love whenever you visit a blog. The writer does care!!

  25. says

    I love what you wrote. I’ve been blogging for a while but only recently have I opened it up publicly and really tried to effect change with what I’m thinking and writing. I don’t have a lot of followers and rarely does anyone comment but I think your motivation is spot on in hoping that we reach even those who don’t let us know they were there. I touch on everything from our family’s battle with Gluten intolerance to green issues and I know that there are people out there looking for the same info! Thanks for inspiring me to keep on blogging even on the days when it feels like I’m talking to myself!

  26. says

    I just took a month break from blogging. Part of it was the lack of comments, I started blogging to keep my family up to date on my daughter, and the lack of comments made me wonder if it was really worth it.

    But after taking the time off I’ve realized that my reason for blogging changed. I was never good at keeping a journal and did not do a good job of keeping up with her baby book. The blog has become my journal of my days with my daughter. So I just started again today.

  27. says

    We talked about this some at the area blogger dinner I recently co-hosted b/c one of our good blog buddies had made the decision THAT very week to stop blogging. But actually, she has not deleted her blog and has posted a couple of times since.

    Her reasoning was simply because she has a young son at home and she didn’t want to spend his early years at the computer instead of with him and the rest of her family.

    I get that but I don’t think I myself could ever just completely stop/quit.

    My point in all of this is that I think everything is cyclical and bloggers will come and go because it’s pretty easy for them to do so. It’s free to set up a blog and some have no issue with saying “bye, bye.” I am not one of those people. Although I’m sure my blogging time will be cut at least in half in Oct. when my third child is born, at this point I can’t imagine just quitting.

    P.S. Hope you stick around for a long, long time! : )

  28. says

    I know… I’m back!

    I also meant to say that if I quit I would miss this community IMMENSELY. I honestly think it was invented for SAHMs! ; )

    K, I’m done. promise.

  29. says

    I know that right now, I’m not blogging anywhere near as much as I would like due to being busy! I do have to say that it is frustrating when people don’t comment–sometimes it’s the comments that truly do motivate you to keep blogging!

  30. says

    Wow, Kristen! What a great post – I had no idea your blog was just a year old, congratulations! I have wanted to quit so many times, mainly because of frustration over comments and the who time management thing that I am soooo bad at! But then when I go back and read what I’ve written, I keep going and I’m glad I have. The blog is such a great journalling tool.
    Although 189 comments would be nice too… ! ;)

  31. says

    With 186 comments, sounds like you’ve come a long way, baby!

    I try hard to read other people’s blogs, and love to leave them a comment to “make their day”. But I suppose time – as it is with any family – is precious, so I mostly like to write. I have so much crap up there in my brain that just wants OUT, but I suppose at some point the words will just run out, or life itself will take over.

    When one of those things happen, it’s nice to know I might actually be missed!!

  32. says

    I feel lucky in the fact that I love comments and traffic on my blog, but I also know I blog for ME. I need to blog, it helps get my head clear and it gives me the opportunity to look back on what I have or in some cases have not accomplished…ha! Don’t you even think about going away.

  33. says

    This post rings so true!! It isn’t about popularity, it is about the connection with others.

    Everyone who is reading this, please keep this in mind when you read someone’s blog. Take just a second to comment – even if it is just a “hi” comment so that the writer knows that you are there. The smallest amount of encouragement goes a very long way!!

  34. says

    This post is brilliant. I blog because I like to write, and also because I want to share that with the world. My blog’s not popular at all. My first comment from a stranger was from the Ultimate Blog Party, and I was pretty darn excited :)

  35. says

    Wow! Kirsten did you ever get a lot of comments on this one–190 so far, now it’s 192.

    I absolutely love your blog and the layout, it’s soooo much fun to read and now I’ve also started following you on Twitter.

    I’ve been blogging now since 2004, primarily on the craft topics I’m interested in and have developed into my business. It started out to be more of a business blog covering topics on wicker repair, chair caning and basketry primarily.

    But after all those years, I began to run out of steam. Before beginning the blog and until just last year, I also was publishing a monthly ezine as a contact and update for my website. I had over 800 subscribers and there too, ran out of steam after nine years of publishing a continuous monthly ezine.

    By reading your blog and others I’m following, the blogging incentive is back and running strong! There’s a new widget I put up recently for Followers, but so far, have NONE! Do me the favor of Following if you could, would certainly help get the ball rolling.

    Kudos to such a great blog as yours, you GO girl!

    The Wicker Woman-Cathryn Peters
    http://wickerwoman.blogspot.com
    http://www.WickerWoman.com/

  36. says

    Kristen – Love your blog. Yes, the blogging community is very powerful. I have been blogging since 2005, and it started as a place to document my marathon training. Once that was over, I really struggled to find my voice. Writing about such a niche subject seemed limiting. Plus, my husband at the time, didn't like the idea of me sharing "my business with the world."

    I puttered in and out of my blog – even tried a name change to inspire me. But nothing was more inpsiring than my divorce in 2007! Suddenly I had freedom to write what I wanted.

    I found great support through my struggles, and new ways to promote my blog via twitter and Facebook. When I started dating my now fiance, I think he partially fell in love with me because of my blog. All of his friends started reading it and loved it too. As a former journalist, it was so nice to have a place for my voice and acceptance!

    Now I have two blogs – http://www.queenofquirky.com and http://www.quirkywedding.wordpress.com.

    And, I'm going to BlogHer in August! Amazing how things change. :)

  37. says

    I write a saving money, deals blog and I don't get an abundance of comments most days. Thank goodness for analytics or I would think I was talking to nobody some days.

    I love what one commenter said about it being like a hug. I spend a little time every weekend commenting on blogs and following blogs that interest me, especially new ones. I love to see those follower pictures on my blog, so I figure others would appreciate it as well.

  38. says

    This was a nice post to read! I just started blogging a couple of months ago. Sometimes I want to stop, but the nice comments here & there keep me going! I definitely think I have a different style than most. When I hear that someone appreciates it, I love it! Thanks for the encouragement. :)

  39. says

    Wow. For a short time blogging, you sure have a smashing conversation going on in the comment section. :) I have been blogging for 5 years and I agree with one of your earlier responses – it is like a 'brain child' and I'm raising it. You can't just give up. However, after having another baby last year, it has gotten more tedious sometimes. I do lapse in days. Maybe I should try your tip I clicked over on today and do some 'bulk blogging' to keep my daily presence up. ;) I'm really bad about pre-posting. I just don't do it.

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