I Don’t Know if We Will Adopt {ADOPTION CARNIVAL}

*UPDATED*
::Adopting Families:: Please add your blog/fundraiser (or both) links below
::Everyone Else:: Please support, visit, shop and pray!

Before traveling to Kenya, I wrote this post, that proclaimed our desire to adopt a child, possibly from Africa.

The desire came from a deep longing to do something to help the 147 million orphans in the world. The desire came because it seemed like an obvious thing for us to do.
Then, I met Susan, an orphan, while I was in Kenya. I saw what $38 a month did in her life. I knew she didn’t belong in America.

I returned home to a wrestling match in my heart and head.
My hubby first voiced his thoughts, “what if we’re not supposed to spend $30,000 on one International adoption, what if we are supposed to sponsor as many kids as we can?”
I said, “What if we’re supposed to do both?”
We chose the immediate, because it was immediate and we started covering our refrigerator with photos.
Then I read this post from a lovely mother who has adopted and will again. She states eloquently that while adoption is an amazing, life-changing, good option, it is a band aid. It’s a fix over a gaping hole in a world that is too poor or too inadequate to care for their own kids. It’s not God’s Plan A for these precious kids.
In a deep, heart-to-heart talk with my hubby the other night about adoption and our future, he said, “Do you have a peace about adopting right now?”
My heart in my throat, “No.”
“What do you have a peace about?” he said.
And out of nowhere, I said, “Returning to Africa. Someday. I don’t know how or when……” And we cried together.
Y’all, I have NO IDEA where that came from or even what it means.
Maybe we will be a band aid, a Plan B for a child.
Or maybe God wants us to work on that gaping hole a continent away from home.
Either way, we could certainly use your prayers as we try to figure it out.
I don’t know if we’ll adopt or move to Africa, but we will do something. Who knows, maybe both……


I believe every Christian should ask themselves/God if they are to adopt. If the answer is no, then we should help those who are adopting! Adoption is expensive and an emotional journey for families. While our family can’t personally help every family adopting, we want to help this family. I don’t know Tiffany, but she asked me to help. And I feel like that is what God wants us to do. You can support them, too, by buying coffee.

Please come back (tomorrow) on Friday, I will be adding a Mcklinky to this post for families who are adopting (you can add your fundraiser or blog).
Please visit the links and choose a family adopting to shop from, support with encouragement and pray over! I strongly believe that God urges every Christian to care for widows and orphans and when we do something for one of these, we do it unto Him.

Comments

  1. 1

    says

    I LOVE that you are so moved to help those in Africa. We sponsor a couple kids through World Vision, so I'm right there with you. But I am also very concerned with those here in the US. Our economy has plummetted and there are so many displaced families. There was a very elaborate encampment set up in a forest not far from me. The sheriff took it apart and who knows what happened to the family or families living there. It's not just about displacement, but about wavering faith. Yes, we are to go out into the world and spread the word among the nations. There are still people who don't know about Jesus. But there are also so many who do who are doubting right now. Our work here is not done either. My heart is breaking over it all.

  2. 2

    says

    I LOVE that you are so moved to help those in Africa. We sponsor a couple kids through World Vision, so I'm right there with you. But I am also very concerned with those here in the US. Our economy has plummetted and there are so many displaced families. There was a very elaborate encampment set up in a forest not far from me. The sheriff took it apart and who knows what happened to the family or families living there. It's not just about displacement, but about wavering faith. Yes, we are to go out into the world and spread the word among the nations. There are still people who don't know about Jesus. But there are also so many who do who are doubting right now. Our work here is not done either. My heart is breaking over it all.

  3. 3

    says

    Kristen,
    I understand your concerns about adopting. If you were meant to adopt, God will make it perfectly clear, you just have to listen.

    Adoption was an idea that floated through my head from time to time since I was a teenager. In 2005, it became a constant whisper in my thoughts. In 2006, that whisper had turned into a scream! We started the process to adopt from Russia that year, in 2007 we brought home our beautiful 2 year old daughter. Did you catch that timeline? She was born in 2005, and became available for adoption in 2006.
    God's plan was for us to be a family, and if that is his plan for you, He will not stop screaming until you do it!

    God Bless your and your family,

    Tara

  4. 4

    says

    Love this post. Wouldn't it be awesome if there were easy answers? I ache for the 147 million as well. But I also suspect that an international adoption path isn't for me. I have no idea about going to live abroad. I have no idea about a lot of things. Right now and for the foreseeable future, I am a foster parent. I wish I could adopt all of my foster kids. I wish it were meant for me to keep the children I love. But I can't. It's not the plan for me or for the kids. I feel like I die every time a child leaves me (maybe that's what dying to self feels like?). But I know what my job is – to be salt and light among birth families, to care for and reunify families in crisis. God had to work on me for a while before I figured that out. But now I feel so honored that He trusted me with this particular job.

    I say all the time that it would be great if we could all know for sure that we were on the right path. But, on this side of heaven, we are just broken people following Jesus to the extent we know how. One thing I love about my God is that He never tells me what He has in store for me. After all, if I knew about all the amazing things I will get to be a part of in my lifetime, how could I ever focus on the work He has for me here and now? He has me on a need-to-know basis, and I am soooo grateful for that.

  5. 5

    says

    I think you are so brave for being so honest about where you are with this. Take peace in knowing that no matter which way you proceed, you WILL be used. It's hard not knowing which direction God will point us, but it is comforting to know that HE knows, isn't it? I attended a conference at my church where a woman who started a native Kenyan started an orphanage there after being gifted with an American education by a generous traveler. She was so touched by being given the gift of education, that she decided that she had to help one person. She started sending her lunch $ back to her home town with instructions for her parents to use it to feed one child. By the end of her semester she was personally feeding 32 children with her lunch money. She then started an orphanage, and home for these children to make sure they were cared for and provided with adequate food and shelter to survive. That is proof of how helping one person can create a change that can change an entire community. It really inspired me to do something, although like you, I'm not sure what that means for me yet. I know of several organizations that are digging into the soil to empower people where they are to help their communities. If you would like me to send you some more information about them, I'd be happy to do that. I'll be praying for you & your family – to figure out exactly what your role will be.

  6. 6

    Tara says

    Kristen,
    I understand your concerns about adopting. If you were meant to adopt, God will make it perfectly clear, you just have to listen.

    Adoption was an idea that floated through my head from time to time since I was a teenager. In 2005, it became a constant whisper in my thoughts. In 2006, that whisper had turned into a scream! We started the process to adopt from Russia that year, in 2007 we brought home our beautiful 2 year old daughter. Did you catch that timeline? She was born in 2005, and became available for adoption in 2006.
    God's plan was for us to be a family, and if that is his plan for you, He will not stop screaming until you do it!

    God Bless your and your family,

    Tara

  7. 7

    says

    Your struggle is blessing so many people – did that come out right?? And so are your efforts to support adoption. I grew up in the world of adoption – literally. My Dad had a big agency and placed kids from all over the world! It was my first job (in his office) but it's not a 9-5 one – we had folks from every country stay with us frequently and I was extremely fortunate to get to travel to some of the countries he placed kids from. I saw an orphanage when I was 15 – life changing!!! But – adoption – this is my opinion but a pretty well informed one – needs to come from the desire to parent, not the desire to help. The desire to help I think is best directed to other efforts and is also needed and wanted by God. Adopting to help leaves the child in a place of needing to be more grateful then their biologically born siblings, and I saw very sad instances of families with an attitude of, "We rescued you from a horrible life – now why are you being a horrible 16 year old??" It's because 16 year olds are horrible, not because they aren't grateful. Oh my.. this is getting long. There is just a lot to be said about it; perhaps I'll turn it into a post of my own if I can figure out how to be encouraging in taking action without discouraging of people's very well intended desire to help.

  8. 8

    says

    Your struggle is blessing so many people – did that come out right?? And so are your efforts to support adoption. I grew up in the world of adoption – literally. My Dad had a big agency and placed kids from all over the world! It was my first job (in his office) but it's not a 9-5 one – we had folks from every country stay with us frequently and I was extremely fortunate to get to travel to some of the countries he placed kids from. I saw an orphanage when I was 15 – life changing!!! But – adoption – this is my opinion but a pretty well informed one – needs to come from the desire to parent, not the desire to help. The desire to help I think is best directed to other efforts and is also needed and wanted by God. Adopting to help leaves the child in a place of needing to be more grateful then their biologically born siblings, and I saw very sad instances of families with an attitude of, "We rescued you from a horrible life – now why are you being a horrible 16 year old??" It's because 16 year olds are horrible, not because they aren't grateful. Oh my.. this is getting long. There is just a lot to be said about it; perhaps I'll turn it into a post of my own if I can figure out how to be encouraging in taking action without discouraging of people's very well intended desire to help.

  9. 9

    ChooseLove says

    Love this post. Wouldn't it be awesome if there were easy answers? I ache for the 147 million as well. But I also suspect that an international adoption path isn't for me. I have no idea about going to live abroad. I have no idea about a lot of things. Right now and for the foreseeable future, I am a foster parent. I wish I could adopt all of my foster kids. I wish it were meant for me to keep the children I love. But I can't. It's not the plan for me or for the kids. I feel like I die every time a child leaves me (maybe that's what dying to self feels like?). But I know what my job is – to be salt and light among birth families, to care for and reunify families in crisis. God had to work on me for a while before I figured that out. But now I feel so honored that He trusted me with this particular job.

    I say all the time that it would be great if we could all know for sure that we were on the right path. But, on this side of heaven, we are just broken people following Jesus to the extent we know how. One thing I love about my God is that He never tells me what He has in store for me. After all, if I knew about all the amazing things I will get to be a part of in my lifetime, how could I ever focus on the work He has for me here and now? He has me on a need-to-know basis, and I am soooo grateful for that.

  10. 10

    Mandy says

    I think you are so brave for being so honest about where you are with this. Take peace in knowing that no matter which way you proceed, you WILL be used. It's hard not knowing which direction God will point us, but it is comforting to know that HE knows, isn't it? I attended a conference at my church where a woman who started a native Kenyan started an orphanage there after being gifted with an American education by a generous traveler. She was so touched by being given the gift of education, that she decided that she had to help one person. She started sending her lunch $ back to her home town with instructions for her parents to use it to feed one child. By the end of her semester she was personally feeding 32 children with her lunch money. She then started an orphanage, and home for these children to make sure they were cared for and provided with adequate food and shelter to survive. That is proof of how helping one person can create a change that can change an entire community. It really inspired me to do something, although like you, I'm not sure what that means for me yet. I know of several organizations that are digging into the soil to empower people where they are to help their communities. If you would like me to send you some more information about them, I'd be happy to do that. I'll be praying for you & your family – to figure out exactly what your role will be.

  11. 11

    says

    I so appreciate your honesty and showing your readers a bit of the process you are going through as you think this through. I have no experience with adoption AT ALL; I do believe it's a great option for some, but not for everyone. I love that you are seeking the Lord about this, and I believe He will answer your prayers for direction. This is such a huge issue, you don't want to rush into it.

    And I love your idea for Friday! What a great way to help families who want to adopt!

  12. 12

    says

    Blogger Megan said…

    I totally appreciate your thoughts about adoption and as an adoptive mother have first hand experience with the "imperfectness" of adoption as a solution to a massive problem. One thought I have though is that adoption is about bringing another child into your family. If you feel like you and your husband are called to have more children, than perhaps adoption is for you. If you feel like God is calling you more to a ministry of sponsorship than that is beautiful as well. Adoption is more than just trying to "rescue" a child and you are right, there are lots of ways to help. But honestly, adoption and sponsorship are two very different ministries and really are like comparing apples to oranges, especially when you start talking about specific children and their specific situations. We adopted our son from Ethiopia last year, not because we wanted to save him from something but because we wanted another child and felt like welcoming a little boy who needed a home into our family was a good way to do that.

  13. 13

    says

    Thank you for your honesty, and for your efforts to bless others! Your Compassion kids are so blessed to have you as their sponsor. :)

  14. 14

    says

    I will be praying for you guys. We are in the same boat, as much as I want to adopt, I'm not exactly sure that is where God is leading us, but I know He is leading us somewhere! PRAYING

  15. 15

    says

    What your hubby says makes sense. What if you are supposed to sponsor as many children as you can? What a great way to share Jesus! You could also take trips back to Africa to meet the children you sponsor.

    If you were to adopt a child from Africa and bring them back to the states, you may be removing them from the opportunity to share Jesus with those around them IN AFRICA. But by sponsoring and keeping in contact, you could be training up little missionaries!

    I don't know you, other than what you post on your blog, but I'll be praying for God's wisdom for you and your family.

    Be encouraged. You know what the voice of the Lord sounds like. You'll know when you have a peace about the right decision. Even if that decision seems like a big undertaking, peace will still come. Sometimes we have to feel the fear and do it anyway :) Things may not turn out the way we originally intended, but if we are obedient, we know God will be honored.

    Blessings,
    Heather

  16. 16

    says

    Love hearing your heart on this topic! I also enjoyed reading through the comments! It's encouraging to see so many who support adoption and orphan care in the ways God has laid on their hearts. We are in the early stages of adopting from Ethiopia.

  17. 17

    says

    we just had a very similar conversation over here. we've always said we wanted to look into adopting, but we realized that if we were going to, we needed to start NOW. after much conversation and prayer, we realized we're not ready. we had zero peace about starting the process.
    and i HATED to admit that. this is something that – as a christian – i SHOULD want, right? it was humbling to realize that maybe this isn't what god is calling us to do.

    thanks for sharing.

  18. 18

    says

    My husband and I are adopting domestically and I think it is a sobering thought that adoption will always be a response to tragedy – a plan B.
    We must always look through the eyes of the child (as you did in Africa) and ask "how can I best help this little wonder of God?" Sometimes it's through adoption. Often it is to help the child right where it is.
    God bless you whatever you feel led to do! Thanks for sharing so openly.

  19. 19

    says

    Love your heart, and your honesty. Our hearts burn as well for orphans and those in poverty. Both missions and adoption are things that we feel God has planned for our family.

    Thanks for spreading the word about Compassion sponsorshipsm and for advocating for those who are adopting. We'll have a fundraisor coming up, and I'd love for you to include us. We need all the support we can get. Just lost my job with the public school system, so we are trusting God to provide the funds for TWO adoptions. :)

  20. 20

    says

    Love your heart, and your honesty. Our hearts burn as well for orphans and those in poverty. Both missions and adoption are things that we feel God has planned for our family.

    Thanks for spreading the word about Compassion sponsorshipsm and for advocating for those who are adopting. We'll have a fundraisor coming up, and I'd love for you to include us. We need all the support we can get. Just lost my job with the public school system, so we are trusting God to provide the funds for TWO adoptions. :)

  21. 21

    says

    oh my goodness.

    so close to home.

    we are considering adoption. seriously.

    but we don't know how/where. domestic/international? i secretly want to just get pregnant so that the decision is taken away from us (we don't want more than 4 children…selfish? maybe.). but i know that i'm just running from God. i know that he wants us to open our home. and this post, about keeping children in their countries really resonates. maybe domestic…but so scary…birth parents showing up out of nowhere…random family in kansas coming out of the woodwork….drug exposure…so much to think about. such weighty decisions. so not wanting to decide. blah.

  22. 22

    says

    I have a heart for adoption and I'm praying that my husband will come around. Not because of infertility or anything, just because I feel such grace in God's plan of adoption for us, and I believe it's something we have been equipped for. However I am also considering first just fostering…helping kids until hopefully they can return to their own families. All of creation and life is a big Plan B in God's eyes anyway…but a glorious one. :) Thank you so much for continually pouring out your heart and touching mine.

  23. 23

    says

    I have a heart for adoption and I'm praying that my husband will come around. Not because of infertility or anything, just because I feel such grace in God's plan of adoption for us, and I believe it's something we have been equipped for. However I am also considering first just fostering…helping kids until hopefully they can return to their own families. All of creation and life is a big Plan B in God's eyes anyway…but a glorious one. :) Thank you so much for continually pouring out your heart and touching mine.

  24. 27

    says

    Love it. I have a vision for a website one day, where folks can shop with An Intent to Do Good. I'd love it if there was one place where adoptive families who are selling goods to raise money for adoption could list their items or advertise their website. Then people who want to help with adoptions, but may not be adopting themselves, can go and find anything they ever needed in one spot. And it all does good. That's my some day vision. First, I've got a little baby I need to get in my arms.

    Love your heart in this, friend. I will spread the word.

  25. 28

    says

    Thank you for your beautiful words. I started reading your blog when you went on the Compassion Bloggers trip and I keep coming back for posts like these. I am at the same stage as you when it comes to the adoption issue. Last year I told everyone I knew that we were going to adopt our next child…and now we don't have peace about it. But we do have peace about sponsoring as many children as possible through Compassion. And I do have peace about helping others in their adoption process.

  26. 31

    says

    When I did the math, I thought the same exact thing. For the price of one adoption, you could sponsor 3 kids from age 3-18. It's something to think about.

    Not diminishing the importance of adoption. Just thinking about the best way to help kids with our limited resources.

  27. 32

    says

    When I did the math, I thought the same exact thing. For the price of one adoption, you could sponsor 3 kids from age 3-18. It's something to think about.

    Not diminishing the importance of adoption. Just thinking about the best way to help kids with our limited resources.

  28. 33

    says

    What beautiful honesty. Thank you for sharing. We have and ache and a pull for God's children in haiti. My hubby has been blessed with going to Haiti twice now and was there this past Jan when the earthquake hit. We already knew a year before we were meant to adopt our dear Nephtali and had started the process. We were given wrong information and had to start over again after the earthquake. We help support the orphanage she is living in. It is a safe place for over 90 children as well as a clinic , school, and clean water source for the community. We have seen so many good things happen in the past few years and are very excited about what God's plans are for the future in Haiti. We aren't sure how we are going to get our Nephtali home but we keep trying. God has made that very clear to us to trust Him in this and move forth. And as far as what works He will have for us in Haiti to do in addition to increasing our family time will only tell!

  29. 34

    Shelly @ Life on the Wild Side says

    I so appreciate your honesty and showing your readers a bit of the process you are going through as you think this through. I have no experience with adoption AT ALL; I do believe it's a great option for some, but not for everyone. I love that you are seeking the Lord about this, and I believe He will answer your prayers for direction. This is such a huge issue, you don't want to rush into it.

    And I love your idea for Friday! What a great way to help families who want to adopt!

  30. 35

    Megan says

    Blogger Megan said…

    I totally appreciate your thoughts about adoption and as an adoptive mother have first hand experience with the "imperfectness" of adoption as a solution to a massive problem. One thought I have though is that adoption is about bringing another child into your family. If you feel like you and your husband are called to have more children, than perhaps adoption is for you. If you feel like God is calling you more to a ministry of sponsorship than that is beautiful as well. Adoption is more than just trying to "rescue" a child and you are right, there are lots of ways to help. But honestly, adoption and sponsorship are two very different ministries and really are like comparing apples to oranges, especially when you start talking about specific children and their specific situations. We adopted our son from Ethiopia last year, not because we wanted to save him from something but because we wanted another child and felt like welcoming a little boy who needed a home into our family was a good way to do that.

  31. 36

    says

    Kristen,

    I came by your blog by way of "It's Almost Naptime". And I thank you for your heart for adoption and for the willingness to say, "No". I can't imagine how hard that is…to follow God's will even when you "want" your own will so badly.

    My husband and I have been flip-flopping for the past 7 months or so. We started out with foster care classes, then went to international adoption, then domestic adoption, and now God has firmly planted us with an agency that will allow us to adopt from the foster care system or have a mother "choose" us to be their unborn child's parents.

    We are relying on God's provision and know that He will do it ALL in His timing.

    Thank you for having a heart for adoption and I look forward to getting to know you through your future posts.

    In Christ,
    Christie
    http://satisfactionthroughchrist.blogspot.com

  32. 37

    Lori says

    Thank you for your honesty, and for your efforts to bless others! Your Compassion kids are so blessed to have you as their sponsor. :)

  33. 38

    jeana says

    I will be praying for you guys. We are in the same boat, as much as I want to adopt, I'm not exactly sure that is where God is leading us, but I know He is leading us somewhere! PRAYING

  34. 39

    HappyGirl says

    What your hubby says makes sense. What if you are supposed to sponsor as many children as you can? What a great way to share Jesus! You could also take trips back to Africa to meet the children you sponsor.

    If you were to adopt a child from Africa and bring them back to the states, you may be removing them from the opportunity to share Jesus with those around them IN AFRICA. But by sponsoring and keeping in contact, you could be training up little missionaries!

    I don't know you, other than what you post on your blog, but I'll be praying for God's wisdom for you and your family.

    Be encouraged. You know what the voice of the Lord sounds like. You'll know when you have a peace about the right decision. Even if that decision seems like a big undertaking, peace will still come. Sometimes we have to feel the fear and do it anyway :) Things may not turn out the way we originally intended, but if we are obedient, we know God will be honored.

    Blessings,
    Heather

  35. 40

    Sandra says

    Love hearing your heart on this topic! I also enjoyed reading through the comments! It's encouraging to see so many who support adoption and orphan care in the ways God has laid on their hearts. We are in the early stages of adopting from Ethiopia.

  36. 41

    melissa says

    we just had a very similar conversation over here. we've always said we wanted to look into adopting, but we realized that if we were going to, we needed to start NOW. after much conversation and prayer, we realized we're not ready. we had zero peace about starting the process.
    and i HATED to admit that. this is something that – as a christian – i SHOULD want, right? it was humbling to realize that maybe this isn't what god is calling us to do.

    thanks for sharing.

  37. 42

    Kirstine says

    My husband and I are adopting domestically and I think it is a sobering thought that adoption will always be a response to tragedy – a plan B.
    We must always look through the eyes of the child (as you did in Africa) and ask "how can I best help this little wonder of God?" Sometimes it's through adoption. Often it is to help the child right where it is.
    God bless you whatever you feel led to do! Thanks for sharing so openly.

  38. 43

    says

    Thank you for your honesty and for your plea – both for prayers, and for help for current adoptive families. I have one son from Ethiopia, and feel as though we are being asked to bring home 2 more (possibly HIV+). The biggest stumbling block is the money. I saw God work a miracle with our first adoption, and have no doubt he would do it again. Yet fear sets in just the same. Anyway, I hope I get to be one of those fundraising families on here sooner rather than later. :) God Bless you !

  39. 44

    Anonymous says

    God really does seem to care about orphans, how that affects each of us is different. Thanks for sharing we you are at. I have enjoyed reading the other comments left as well.

    I tried to clink the link for the family you mentioned, but the link does not work. It sent me to a yahoo page.

    Anna

  40. 45

    Anonymous says

    God really does seem to care about orphans, how that affects each of us is different. Thanks for sharing we you are at. I have enjoyed reading the other comments left as well.

    I tried to clink the link for the family you mentioned, but the link does not work. It sent me to a yahoo page.

    Anna

  41. 46

    Jeannett says

    oh my goodness.

    so close to home.

    we are considering adoption. seriously.

    but we don't know how/where. domestic/international? i secretly want to just get pregnant so that the decision is taken away from us (we don't want more than 4 children…selfish? maybe.). but i know that i'm just running from God. i know that he wants us to open our home. and this post, about keeping children in their countries really resonates. maybe domestic…but so scary…birth parents showing up out of nowhere…random family in kansas coming out of the woodwork….drug exposure…so much to think about. such weighty decisions. so not wanting to decide. blah.

  42. 47

    Anonymous says

    Don't you think that, even though adoption isn't God's Plan A, these kids still need loving homes? If they don't have adoptive families, then what do they have?

    No Plan A or B?

  43. 48

    Anonymous says

    Don't you think that, even though adoption isn't God's Plan A, these kids still need loving homes? If they don't have adoptive families, then what do they have?

    No Plan A or B?

  44. 51

    says

    I have wrestled with these same questions. My husband has a lot more peace about it — he believes that a sovereign God knows our daughters' stories, and that they are meant to include us. (We are in the middle of our second international adoption.)

    God gives me peace when he reminds me of two things: first, our girls were already in an orphanage before we came into the picture, and second, the things that happen to 10-, 12- or 15-year-olds when they "age out" of an orphanage aren't pretty. We know for sure His plan for them wasn't being trafficked or working as a prostitute, and we are determined that at least two little girls will be spared those possibilities.

    We sponsor a girls' home in our girls' birth country that rescues abandoned baby girls and is raising them to know Jesus. So, we try to go at the problem from two fronts . . . knowing that both are Plan B.

    Thanks for having the courage to ask good questions.
    Nancy

  45. 52

    says

    I have wrestled with these same questions. My husband has a lot more peace about it — he believes that a sovereign God knows our daughters' stories, and that they are meant to include us. (We are in the middle of our second international adoption.)

    God gives me peace when he reminds me of two things: first, our girls were already in an orphanage before we came into the picture, and second, the things that happen to 10-, 12- or 15-year-olds when they "age out" of an orphanage aren't pretty. We know for sure His plan for them wasn't being trafficked or working as a prostitute, and we are determined that at least two little girls will be spared those possibilities.

    We sponsor a girls' home in our girls' birth country that rescues abandoned baby girls and is raising them to know Jesus. So, we try to go at the problem from two fronts . . . knowing that both are Plan B.

    Thanks for having the courage to ask good questions.
    Nancy

  46. 53

    O Mom says

    This was beautiful and honest and inspires me to not have all the answers but just do something.

  47. 54

    says

    I love that you are sharing your heart as you and your husband struggle over this! I think you are helping many, many others who have the same questions. And maybe encouraging some to begin asking the questions that need to.

    My husband and I spent 2 years asking God, "Really? Are you sure?" when we felt him laying adoption on our hearts. All I can say is we prayed a lot and He made His answer SO CLEAR through tons of strange "coincidences" that I knew were His gentle hand leading. I do think God has plans for people on many sides of caring for orphans. But, I've also realized adoption affects more than just the child you are adopting. God has done wonderful, positive changes in my whole family through us just beginning to adopt. Also, we've been able to share Jesus with many people as they've asked us "Why adopt when you have children and could have more biologically?"

  48. 55

    Lora Lynn @ Vitafamiliae says

    Love it. I have a vision for a website one day, where folks can shop with An Intent to Do Good. I'd love it if there was one place where adoptive families who are selling goods to raise money for adoption could list their items or advertise their website. Then people who want to help with adoptions, but may not be adopting themselves, can go and find anything they ever needed in one spot. And it all does good. That's my some day vision. First, I've got a little baby I need to get in my arms.

    Love your heart in this, friend. I will spread the word.

  49. 56

    Jill Foley says

    Thank you for your beautiful words. I started reading your blog when you went on the Compassion Bloggers trip and I keep coming back for posts like these. I am at the same stage as you when it comes to the adoption issue. Last year I told everyone I knew that we were going to adopt our next child…and now we don't have peace about it. But we do have peace about sponsoring as many children as possible through Compassion. And I do have peace about helping others in their adoption process.

  50. 57

    Erin says

    What beautiful honesty. Thank you for sharing. We have and ache and a pull for God's children in haiti. My hubby has been blessed with going to Haiti twice now and was there this past Jan when the earthquake hit. We already knew a year before we were meant to adopt our dear Nephtali and had started the process. We were given wrong information and had to start over again after the earthquake. We help support the orphanage she is living in. It is a safe place for over 90 children as well as a clinic , school, and clean water source for the community. We have seen so many good things happen in the past few years and are very excited about what God's plans are for the future in Haiti. We aren't sure how we are going to get our Nephtali home but we keep trying. God has made that very clear to us to trust Him in this and move forth. And as far as what works He will have for us in Haiti to do in addition to increasing our family time will only tell!

  51. 58

    says

    Thank you SO much for sharing this! I think your perspective is not "out there" much. Adoption truly is a band-aid…not the perfect situation for children, but it is still needed. We adopted our daughter from Ethiopia, and feel called to adopt again, but that is not sufficient. I cannot leave Ethiopia behind. Adoption is just a very small bandaid on a really big wound. There are so many that need help and healing.

  52. 59

    Christie says

    Kristen,

    I came by your blog by way of "It's Almost Naptime". And I thank you for your heart for adoption and for the willingness to say, "No". I can't imagine how hard that is…to follow God's will even when you "want" your own will so badly.

    My husband and I have been flip-flopping for the past 7 months or so. We started out with foster care classes, then went to international adoption, then domestic adoption, and now God has firmly planted us with an agency that will allow us to adopt from the foster care system or have a mother "choose" us to be their unborn child's parents.

    We are relying on God's provision and know that He will do it ALL in His timing.

    Thank you for having a heart for adoption and I look forward to getting to know you through your future posts.

    In Christ,
    Christie
    http://satisfactionthroughchrist.blogspot.com

  53. 60

    says

    I actually completely disagree with adoption being a band aid. I am an adoptive mom to a domestically adopted child that was born to a drug addicted, homeless prostitute. While my child was a product of sin, I believe that she was fully intended to live with us. For us, God had us take our faith to places I didn't think. We placed our trust, our prayers, our faith into a crack addicted basket. We had to trust (a county adoption, so we knew that our child would be removed from the mother) and know that God had it all laid out for us.

    I am not a band aid. I am a mother. I am caring for the child that God intended for us to have. He knew that my parts were broken. Through me, family members benefited from the genetic testing that I had done and they were able to have babies. I was not. We are all alive, though. It is through adoption that my husband and I have a wonderful testimony to share with others on how God has worked in our lives and in the life of K-.

    I can't help but to know that we were and still are His plan A.

  54. 61

    says

    I actually completely disagree with adoption being a band aid. I am an adoptive mom to a domestically adopted child that was born to a drug addicted, homeless prostitute. While my child was a product of sin, I believe that she was fully intended to live with us. For us, God had us take our faith to places I didn't think. We placed our trust, our prayers, our faith into a crack addicted basket. We had to trust (a county adoption, so we knew that our child would be removed from the mother) and know that God had it all laid out for us.

    I am not a band aid. I am a mother. I am caring for the child that God intended for us to have. He knew that my parts were broken. Through me, family members benefited from the genetic testing that I had done and they were able to have babies. I was not. We are all alive, though. It is through adoption that my husband and I have a wonderful testimony to share with others on how God has worked in our lives and in the life of K-.

    I can't help but to know that we were and still are His plan A.

  55. 62

    says

    Bailey's Leaf-thank you for your honest, heartfelt response. I hope you aren't offended by my opinion. I completely understand what you are saying and I agree that YOU are not a band-aid. You are a wonderful Mom.

    God is Sovereign and I believe He uses adoption to help heal the world, adopted families included. I just believe God created families to be together. But they are broken sometimes because of sin. It certainly doesn't make you any less of a mother or K any less your daughter.

    Thank you.

  56. 63

    says

    Bailey's Leaf-thank you for your honest, heartfelt response. I hope you aren't offended by my opinion. I completely understand what you are saying and I agree that YOU are not a band-aid. You are a wonderful Mom.

    God is Sovereign and I believe He uses adoption to help heal the world, adopted families included. I just believe God created families to be together. But they are broken sometimes because of sin. It certainly doesn't make you any less of a mother or K any less your daughter.

    Thank you.

  57. 64

    says

    Love your post. We chose both. We are in the process of adopting a second child with special needs. After having two bio children (the second having fairly involved special needs), we knew we were not meant to have more, but to give homes to other kids who were considered "hard to place" due to special needs.

    However, the place where our child lives now – the second adoption – is a foster care center for medically fragile kids abroad who we help support.

    After the adoption, we also plan to sponsor kids, thanks to you. ;)

    You have more of an impact than just your fridge. Our fridge will one day be filled too.

  58. 65

    says

    Hey there Kristen,
    I love this post because it so reflects how God has changed my heart, too. We have adopted, a little cutie pie from Ethiopia last year, and we know that it was definitely God's will for us. But you're right. It's not the answer. Adoption is a response to crisis. Something happened in that child's life that should not have happened, and now he cannot be parented by his biological family. That is heartbreaking.

    I used to think, "Everyone needs to adopt!" and now I feel very differently. Adoption isn't for everyone. It's hard, and it's not the romantic experience we would like it to be. Don't get me wrong, it's absolutely wonderful, but challenging as well.

    You have a passion, and it sounds like many thoughts swirling in your head. You know what you need? The Christian Alliance for Orphans. I just got back from their Summit VI in MN, and it was amazing. My husband and I went last year as well, in TX, and it changed our lives. We learned so much and excited to see where God is leading us in the area of global orphan care. Because I think that these kids (most) should stay in their countries of birth, if at all possible. To mobilize indegenous churches to step up and begin a foster care system based within church members. Adoption is a wonderful option, and we believe we will do it again, for sure, but we can't adopt 147 million kids. So we want to know what we CAN do.
    Blessings, sister. And look up the Alliance. And I'd be happy to chat with you, too. We were sort of swirling around in this realization of how many orphans there are, and our hearts were broken and we had no idea what to do. Summit has helped us so very much, to find direction, information, and to equip us for this task.

  59. 66

    says

    Hey there Kristen,
    I love this post because it so reflects how God has changed my heart, too. We have adopted, a little cutie pie from Ethiopia last year, and we know that it was definitely God's will for us. But you're right. It's not the answer. Adoption is a response to crisis. Something happened in that child's life that should not have happened, and now he cannot be parented by his biological family. That is heartbreaking.

    I used to think, "Everyone needs to adopt!" and now I feel very differently. Adoption isn't for everyone. It's hard, and it's not the romantic experience we would like it to be. Don't get me wrong, it's absolutely wonderful, but challenging as well.

    You have a passion, and it sounds like many thoughts swirling in your head. You know what you need? The Christian Alliance for Orphans. I just got back from their Summit VI in MN, and it was amazing. My husband and I went last year as well, in TX, and it changed our lives. We learned so much and excited to see where God is leading us in the area of global orphan care. Because I think that these kids (most) should stay in their countries of birth, if at all possible. To mobilize indegenous churches to step up and begin a foster care system based within church members. Adoption is a wonderful option, and we believe we will do it again, for sure, but we can't adopt 147 million kids. So we want to know what we CAN do.
    Blessings, sister. And look up the Alliance. And I'd be happy to chat with you, too. We were sort of swirling around in this realization of how many orphans there are, and our hearts were broken and we had no idea what to do. Summit has helped us so very much, to find direction, information, and to equip us for this task.

  60. 69

    Jody Britton says

    Thank you for your honesty and for your plea – both for prayers, and for help for current adoptive families. I have one son from Ethiopia, and feel as though we are being asked to bring home 2 more (possibly HIV+). The biggest stumbling block is the money. I saw God work a miracle with our first adoption, and have no doubt he would do it again. Yet fear sets in just the same. Anyway, I hope I get to be one of those fundraising families on here sooner rather than later. :) God Bless you !

  61. 70

    It Feels Like Chaos says

    I love that you are sharing your heart as you and your husband struggle over this! I think you are helping many, many others who have the same questions. And maybe encouraging some to begin asking the questions that need to.

    My husband and I spent 2 years asking God, "Really? Are you sure?" when we felt him laying adoption on our hearts. All I can say is we prayed a lot and He made His answer SO CLEAR through tons of strange "coincidences" that I knew were His gentle hand leading. I do think God has plans for people on many sides of caring for orphans. But, I've also realized adoption affects more than just the child you are adopting. God has done wonderful, positive changes in my whole family through us just beginning to adopt. Also, we've been able to share Jesus with many people as they've asked us "Why adopt when you have children and could have more biologically?"

  62. 71

    Sharon says

    Thank you SO much for sharing this! I think your perspective is not "out there" much. Adoption truly is a band-aid…not the perfect situation for children, but it is still needed. We adopted our daughter from Ethiopia, and feel called to adopt again, but that is not sufficient. I cannot leave Ethiopia behind. Adoption is just a very small bandaid on a really big wound. There are so many that need help and healing.

  63. 72

    says

    Just wanted to say that I think what you wrote is awesome. I am a huge adoption advocate- and I love that while you may not feel you are to adopt right now (or perhaps ever)- you see the need and are willing to do something to help out. Thanks for that. :0)

  64. 73

    says

    You all are one amazing family. I will be praying for your decision. I know God will show you what to do.

    Tim @ Families Again

  65. 74

    says

    I went on a mission trip to Uganda & Ethiopia back in January. My friend Sumer went with me and now her family is going there to live in June. You might enjoy reading her story…www.sumerwithonem.blogspot.com

  66. 77

    Heather says

    Love your post. We chose both. We are in the process of adopting a second child with special needs. After having two bio children (the second having fairly involved special needs), we knew we were not meant to have more, but to give homes to other kids who were considered "hard to place" due to special needs.

    However, the place where our child lives now – the second adoption – is a foster care center for medically fragile kids abroad who we help support.

    After the adoption, we also plan to sponsor kids, thanks to you. ;)

    You have more of an impact than just your fridge. Our fridge will one day be filled too.

  67. 78

    says

    Thank you Kristen for talking about adoption and what we should each be doing about God's children. While I will be praying for your family choice & direction, for the children in Africa and other countries, I would like to ask for everyone to also pray for our children in the US. I have worked with the foster care/adoption system in the US for almost 20 years and the number of children in the US foster care system continues to increase. May is National Foster Care Awareness Month, so we may all be hearing more information now, but prayers ARE needed 24/7/365 for our children here as well. There are several hundred thousand children in the US foster care system through NO FAULT of their own and they need permanent, loving homes (adoption) and foster families as well.

    Thank you!!

  68. 79

    says

    Thank you Kristen for talking about adoption and what we should each be doing about God's children. While I will be praying for your family choice & direction, for the children in Africa and other countries, I would like to ask for everyone to also pray for our children in the US. I have worked with the foster care/adoption system in the US for almost 20 years and the number of children in the US foster care system continues to increase. May is National Foster Care Awareness Month, so we may all be hearing more information now, but prayers ARE needed 24/7/365 for our children here as well. There are several hundred thousand children in the US foster care system through NO FAULT of their own and they need permanent, loving homes (adoption) and foster families as well.

    Thank you!!

  69. 80

    says

    Although we have adopted both through foster care and international, we feel our calling to be foster care. I believe that each person has a calling to help in some way, the trick is determining what it is and acting upon it.

  70. 81

    says

    Although we have adopted both through foster care and international, we feel our calling to be foster care. I believe that each person has a calling to help in some way, the trick is determining what it is and acting upon it.

  71. 82

    says

    Thank you SO MUCH for the link-up! We are selling tees for our Haiti adoption so I linked up. :)

    I think it's important to note that adoption is a bandaid for the broken system, yes. But for the individual child who has been taken out of an institution, it is so much more than a bandaid. To me, an orphanage is a bandaid for a child's need for family. It has been sobering to see the effects of orphanage life on our son, even though he is only three, and even though he was at a great orphanage. Things I will never, never write about publicly.

    Sponsorship is needed for families, adoption is needed for children without. I don't think it's an either/or. Just different ways of ministering that meet different needs. I'm always thankful when God is stirring people to act in any way. I appreciate your honesty!

  72. 83

    says

    Thank you SO MUCH for the link-up! We are selling tees for our Haiti adoption so I linked up. :)

    I think it's important to note that adoption is a bandaid for the broken system, yes. But for the individual child who has been taken out of an institution, it is so much more than a bandaid. To me, an orphanage is a bandaid for a child's need for family. It has been sobering to see the effects of orphanage life on our son, even though he is only three, and even though he was at a great orphanage. Things I will never, never write about publicly.

    Sponsorship is needed for families, adoption is needed for children without. I don't think it's an either/or. Just different ways of ministering that meet different needs. I'm always thankful when God is stirring people to act in any way. I appreciate your honesty!

  73. 84

    Amy says

    Just wanted to say that I think what you wrote is awesome. I am a huge adoption advocate- and I love that while you may not feel you are to adopt right now (or perhaps ever)- you see the need and are willing to do something to help out. Thanks for that. :0)

  74. 85

    Tim says

    You all are one amazing family. I will be praying for your decision. I know God will show you what to do.

    Tim @ Families Again

  75. 86

    Big Nanny says

    I went on a mission trip to Uganda & Ethiopia back in January. My friend Sumer went with me and now her family is going there to live in June. You might enjoy reading her story…www.sumerwithonem.blogspot.com

  76. 87

    says

    I didn't get a chance to join the discussion yesterday, but I whole-heartedly agree with Kristen above me. No, I do not think every Christian is called to the ministry of adoption, but I do think every Christian has a role to play. It is something that we all must really bathe in prayer.

    I also want to bring out the fact that our WHOLE world is a plan B. WE are a plan B. None of this is how it was supposed to be. We were supposed to be perfect people living in a perfect world – with no sin, no death, no illness – no orphanages. Every family would be perfect and whole. But sin entered and ruined that plan. Countless times in Scripture we can see that God has redeemed big messes. Nothing is unredeemable. God is not handcuffed by our foolish choices or difficult circumstances.

    So, while Adoption was not God's plan A, if you will, none of this was. God ordained adoption though. From what I read in Scripture He loves adoption. Again not everyone was called to it.

    Does that make sense???

  77. 88

    says

    I didn't get a chance to join the discussion yesterday, but I whole-heartedly agree with Kristen above me. No, I do not think every Christian is called to the ministry of adoption, but I do think every Christian has a role to play. It is something that we all must really bathe in prayer.

    I also want to bring out the fact that our WHOLE world is a plan B. WE are a plan B. None of this is how it was supposed to be. We were supposed to be perfect people living in a perfect world – with no sin, no death, no illness – no orphanages. Every family would be perfect and whole. But sin entered and ruined that plan. Countless times in Scripture we can see that God has redeemed big messes. Nothing is unredeemable. God is not handcuffed by our foolish choices or difficult circumstances.

    So, while Adoption was not God's plan A, if you will, none of this was. God ordained adoption though. From what I read in Scripture He loves adoption. Again not everyone was called to it.

    Does that make sense???

  78. 89

    says

    We are waiting to adopt our first child domestically, and the wait is starting to take it's toll on me. Prayers would be greatly appreciated.

  79. 90

    says

    We are waiting to adopt our first child domestically, and the wait is starting to take it's toll on me. Prayers would be greatly appreciated.

  80. 91

    says

    You are right. This world we live in is not as it is suppose to be. I see the comments and think some have misunderstood you. We live in a world marred by sin, and seeing the effect of that on children breaks your heart because you KNOW His love for them. And I think your point is adoption is only a bandaid over a gaping wound that you wish wasn't there for these kids in the first place. And the need is so huge, so great, for so many. God's design is for these kids to be whole: no pain, no need, no scars or baggage. Adoption can't remove those things. It is a salve in the wound and God's way of redeeming what has been lost. As in our own story. We are not living as we were meant to. What was lost in the garden is restored through death and pain, and not ultimately realized until we are in His presence.

    I thought your post was beautiful because you are wrestling. You are available and asking Him what HE wants you to do. And it's ok that you don't know yet. He will lead you because you are listening. How sad for those who are never willing to even ask. Stay broken. And keep sharing. I am grateful for your honesty.

    (Just went back and read Tiffany's comment I had somehow overlooked. Yes! I agree! I think she said better what i was trying to say!–I've only had one cup of coffee–forgive me. : ))

  81. 92

    says

    You are right. This world we live in is not as it is suppose to be. I see the comments and think some have misunderstood you. We live in a world marred by sin, and seeing the effect of that on children breaks your heart because you KNOW His love for them. And I think your point is adoption is only a bandaid over a gaping wound that you wish wasn't there for these kids in the first place. And the need is so huge, so great, for so many. God's design is for these kids to be whole: no pain, no need, no scars or baggage. Adoption can't remove those things. It is a salve in the wound and God's way of redeeming what has been lost. As in our own story. We are not living as we were meant to. What was lost in the garden is restored through death and pain, and not ultimately realized until we are in His presence.

    I thought your post was beautiful because you are wrestling. You are available and asking Him what HE wants you to do. And it's ok that you don't know yet. He will lead you because you are listening. How sad for those who are never willing to even ask. Stay broken. And keep sharing. I am grateful for your honesty.

    (Just went back and read Tiffany's comment I had somehow overlooked. Yes! I agree! I think she said better what i was trying to say!–I've only had one cup of coffee–forgive me. : ))

  82. 93

    says

    Tiffany and Rachel-that is EXACTLY what I meant-thank you for putting it so eloquently. We are all God's Plan B-from Adam on…because we need redemption. Yes, I'm wrestling…because I'm fighting.

  83. 94

    says

    Tiffany and Rachel-that is EXACTLY what I meant-thank you for putting it so eloquently. We are all God's Plan B-from Adam on…because we need redemption. Yes, I'm wrestling…because I'm fighting.

  84. 95

    Spring says

    I have enjoyed the comment discussion today so much, as well as the post! Thank you everyone for sharing! We are in the process of adoption two brothers from Haiti. We believe we have also been stirred to a long term servant's heart for Haiti, and the work going on there… even though we dont' know what it will look like exactly.
    Also, I loved Mandy's comment, because I and 4 others, without speaking to each other, have wondered if our oldest son we are adopting may be coming here, to be prepared by God to go back and make a difference for his people. Time will tell! Who knows, maybe my husband and I will end up living their ourselves some day- we know will support and travel to serve. You can read our adoption story here:
    http://www.adoption.gouette.com/

  85. 96

    Spring says

    I have enjoyed the comment discussion today so much, as well as the post! Thank you everyone for sharing! We are in the process of adoption two brothers from Haiti. We believe we have also been stirred to a long term servant's heart for Haiti, and the work going on there… even though we dont' know what it will look like exactly.
    Also, I loved Mandy's comment, because I and 4 others, without speaking to each other, have wondered if our oldest son we are adopting may be coming here, to be prepared by God to go back and make a difference for his people. Time will tell! Who knows, maybe my husband and I will end up living their ourselves some day- we know will support and travel to serve. You can read our adoption story here:
    http://www.adoption.gouette.com/

  86. 97

    says

    My heart so resonates with this post. We are, hopefully, nearing the end of our adoption journey. It may or may not be the last one we take… I know God is calling us to do more, just not exactally sure what that means.

    I'm trusting he will lay out the bread crumbs one by one and will give us the grace to follow in obedience wherever he leads. I know He has given us a heart for the orphaned. And while I'm not sure where it will take us I'm trusting He will lead.

    Thanks for this post and for sharing your heart!

  87. 98

    says

    My heart so resonates with this post. We are, hopefully, nearing the end of our adoption journey. It may or may not be the last one we take… I know God is calling us to do more, just not exactally sure what that means.

    I'm trusting he will lay out the bread crumbs one by one and will give us the grace to follow in obedience wherever he leads. I know He has given us a heart for the orphaned. And while I'm not sure where it will take us I'm trusting He will lead.

    Thanks for this post and for sharing your heart!

  88. 99

    says

    God will direct your paths as you spend time in His Word and in prayer. He will show you what to do! I am confident as I saw Him do this clearly in our life and am now asking God to show us what to do next. It is not clear now and so we spend time praying, waiting, reading the Bible, fasting at times, and seeking Him, much like I am sure you are doing. May God direct your path!

    I wanted to let you know that I added a post about this on my blog and I added your blog banner. Please let me know if you would rather I take it down. Hope God send many, many people here to help with these fundraisers.

    Blessings,
    Amy @ http://missionalmamassoul.blogspot.com/2010/05/to-help-those-who-are-adopting.html

  89. 100

    says

    God will direct your paths as you spend time in His Word and in prayer. He will show you what to do! I am confident as I saw Him do this clearly in our life and am now asking God to show us what to do next. It is not clear now and so we spend time praying, waiting, reading the Bible, fasting at times, and seeking Him, much like I am sure you are doing. May God direct your path!

    I wanted to let you know that I added a post about this on my blog and I added your blog banner. Please let me know if you would rather I take it down. Hope God send many, many people here to help with these fundraisers.

    Blessings,
    Amy @ http://missionalmamassoul.blogspot.com/2010/05/to-help-those-who-are-adopting.html

  90. 101

    says

    What a lovely idea to host this adoption carnival. We're already adoptive parents and are in the process of adopting again. The experience of being "expectant parents" is a little different than carrying one's own children. Thank you for helping us share that with others.

    Thank you also for sharing your own journey to answering God's call. Your blog is a highlight of my morning. Your gift of writing with candor, creativity, humor and spirit makes reading your posts such a joy. I've sat before my computer in tears on many occasions because of your words…some power and touching and some so flippin' funny. (I made my husband watch the video of you in the cow suit campaigning for sweet tea because he wanted to know why I almost fell out of my chair laughing.:)

    So thank you for this precious ministry you offer through your blog. It's a gift, ideed!
    Blessings,
    Maria

  91. 102

    says

    What a lovely idea to host this adoption carnival. We're already adoptive parents and are in the process of adopting again. The experience of being "expectant parents" is a little different than carrying one's own children. Thank you for helping us share that with others.

    Thank you also for sharing your own journey to answering God's call. Your blog is a highlight of my morning. Your gift of writing with candor, creativity, humor and spirit makes reading your posts such a joy. I've sat before my computer in tears on many occasions because of your words…some power and touching and some so flippin' funny. (I made my husband watch the video of you in the cow suit campaigning for sweet tea because he wanted to know why I almost fell out of my chair laughing.:)

    So thank you for this precious ministry you offer through your blog. It's a gift, ideed!
    Blessings,
    Maria

  92. 103

    says

    Thank you for stopping by our blog and supporting our adoption by the purchase of 2 Tees! Love how you are a woman of your word!! Very cool! Also, my hubby and I have had almost the exact conversations regarding adoption 1 child vs. supporting more with the same amount. We prayed, sought council, searched the scriptures until God made it clear to both of us there was a child he was fashioning for our family half way around the world. Its hard to put into words, it was a God thing! We knew we had to be obedient to his call on our lives. He doesn't call everyone to adopt, but I think there is something that we can all do to be the hands and feet of Christ to a hurting world. God will direct your steps as you seek his heart in this matter. The journey is all about him drawing us closer to him!!
    With joy,
    Amy

  93. 104

    says

    Thank you for stopping by our blog and supporting our adoption by the purchase of 2 Tees! Love how you are a woman of your word!! Very cool! Also, my hubby and I have had almost the exact conversations regarding adoption 1 child vs. supporting more with the same amount. We prayed, sought council, searched the scriptures until God made it clear to both of us there was a child he was fashioning for our family half way around the world. Its hard to put into words, it was a God thing! We knew we had to be obedient to his call on our lives. He doesn't call everyone to adopt, but I think there is something that we can all do to be the hands and feet of Christ to a hurting world. God will direct your steps as you seek his heart in this matter. The journey is all about him drawing us closer to him!!
    With joy,
    Amy

  94. 108

    says

    I follow you on twitter,( I think you follow me as well) and a girlfriend just linked to your blog from fb… I just have to tell you that I find myself more and more saying, "you know that blogger, 'We are THAT family?' well, I think she's describing me!" lol
    Anyway, my hubby and I have 4 of our kids, and we are just beginning the journey of adoption from Ethiopia… in fact I sent in our application TODAY! Oddly enough, my husband and I have had similar conversations with thoughts like, "maybe we're not only supposed to adopt, but maybe we're supposed to move to Africa someday and run an orphanage." wow. If you haven't read these two books, I HIGHLY recommend them: Adopted for Life by Russell Moore, and Wess Stafford's book, Too Small to Ignore. THESE BOOKS are so LIFECHANGING!! Check them out:)
    Katie

  95. 109

    says

    I follow you on twitter,( I think you follow me as well) and a girlfriend just linked to your blog from fb… I just have to tell you that I find myself more and more saying, "you know that blogger, 'We are THAT family?' well, I think she's describing me!" lol
    Anyway, my hubby and I have 4 of our kids, and we are just beginning the journey of adoption from Ethiopia… in fact I sent in our application TODAY! Oddly enough, my husband and I have had similar conversations with thoughts like, "maybe we're not only supposed to adopt, but maybe we're supposed to move to Africa someday and run an orphanage." wow. If you haven't read these two books, I HIGHLY recommend them: Adopted for Life by Russell Moore, and Wess Stafford's book, Too Small to Ignore. THESE BOOKS are so LIFECHANGING!! Check them out:)
    Katie

  96. 110

    says

    I'm so glad you wrote that. We have been struggling to get pregnant with our 2nd child and know several families who have adopted from Africa recently. My husband said a few months ago, "Why don't we adopt?" I agree that adoption is an awesome thing, but I don't have a peace about it either. I want to. I want to be passionate about it. But I'm not. And even after asking daily, God has not given me that passion. So I'm searching for what He DOES want me to do instead. I'm glad to know I'm not alone in not feeling a peace about it at this moment in my life.

  97. 111

    says

    I'm so glad you wrote that. We have been struggling to get pregnant with our 2nd child and know several families who have adopted from Africa recently. My husband said a few months ago, "Why don't we adopt?" I agree that adoption is an awesome thing, but I don't have a peace about it either. I want to. I want to be passionate about it. But I'm not. And even after asking daily, God has not given me that passion. So I'm searching for what He DOES want me to do instead. I'm glad to know I'm not alone in not feeling a peace about it at this moment in my life.

  98. 112

    says

    Thanks for coming alongside those of us who are in the adoption process. Thanks for using your blog to do big things!

    I have linked our adoption fundraiser: Custom Art about What Your Family is About

    and your post made me cry. . .thanks for your soft heart; thanks for being open to whatever God may say. . I will close this comment with a prayer for you and hubby.

    Warmly-
    Su

  99. 113

    says

    Thanks for coming alongside those of us who are in the adoption process. Thanks for using your blog to do big things!

    I have linked our adoption fundraiser: Custom Art about What Your Family is About

    and your post made me cry. . .thanks for your soft heart; thanks for being open to whatever God may say. . I will close this comment with a prayer for you and hubby.

    Warmly-
    Su

  100. 114

    Jessica says

    your heart for orphans is Beautiful! Thank you for setting up tis link list for families to post their fundraisers!

  101. 117

    says

    I thank you for visiting my blog. I loved your post and how real you have been with your process. I will send you an e-mail to get your addy to mail you some notecards. ;) thank you!

  102. 118

    says

    I thank you for visiting my blog. I loved your post and how real you have been with your process. I will send you an e-mail to get your addy to mail you some notecards. ;) thank you!

  103. 119

    says

    It's great to hear about all these families adopting! I know it is an emotional process, fraught with highs and lows. It is costly and often deceptive.
    We've walked that road, and in the end, the Lord blessed us with two boys that are now grown young men. The story is never simple but profound how God works out His plan for each of us.
    Someday, I will share more in my blog or in an article. But for now, I will keep you in my prayers.
    Like Chick, we support a child in Africa through World Vision as well. But there are many here in the US who need love and families and the word of the Lord in their lives. For each family, He has a unique plan. Keep seeking His face and His plan for you.
    In Him,
    Janis

  104. 120

    says

    It's great to hear about all these families adopting! I know it is an emotional process, fraught with highs and lows. It is costly and often deceptive.
    We've walked that road, and in the end, the Lord blessed us with two boys that are now grown young men. The story is never simple but profound how God works out His plan for each of us.
    Someday, I will share more in my blog or in an article. But for now, I will keep you in my prayers.
    Like Chick, we support a child in Africa through World Vision as well. But there are many here in the US who need love and families and the word of the Lord in their lives. For each family, He has a unique plan. Keep seeking His face and His plan for you.
    In Him,
    Janis

  105. 121

    says

    Thank you for sharing your heart on this topic. My husband and I are in the very beginning stages of adopting from Rwanda. We feel called to adopt, but agree that not everyone is. We are all called to be obedient to whatever the Lord asks us to do. It is obvious that you are doing just that.

  106. 122

    says

    Thank you for sharing your heart on this topic. My husband and I are in the very beginning stages of adopting from Rwanda. We feel called to adopt, but agree that not everyone is. We are all called to be obedient to whatever the Lord asks us to do. It is obvious that you are doing just that.

  107. 123

    says

    Kristen, WOWWW!!! I was busy this week updating our adoption homestudy and missed your email & your post!! I just read thru all the amazing comments… your readers ROCK!! I wish they would all drop by my crazy adoption blog and share the love:)) lol Honestly, this topic can bring up so many emotions. Thank you for sharing your heart and I will pray for you & hubby as you consider waiting on adoption. I talk to families everyday on the hot topic and I understand that tug & pull of the heart. We waited 8 years to adopt Zoie, but I don't regret the wait… we wouldn't have our blessing and miracle girl!! Please know you can email me for crazy advice or support anytime!
    xoxo
    Kari
    http://www.mycrazyadoption.com

  108. 124

    says

    Kristen, WOWWW!!! I was busy this week updating our adoption homestudy and missed your email & your post!! I just read thru all the amazing comments… your readers ROCK!! I wish they would all drop by my crazy adoption blog and share the love:)) lol Honestly, this topic can bring up so many emotions. Thank you for sharing your heart and I will pray for you & hubby as you consider waiting on adoption. I talk to families everyday on the hot topic and I understand that tug & pull of the heart. We waited 8 years to adopt Zoie, but I don't regret the wait… we wouldn't have our blessing and miracle girl!! Please know you can email me for crazy advice or support anytime!
    xoxo
    Kari
    http://www.mycrazyadoption.com

  109. 125

    says

    BTW- if anyone wants to come on over to http://WWW.MYCRAZYADOPTION on Monday- I have a special post ready for adoption fundraisers!! This is another spot to add your Linky Thumbnail and shout out for your adoption projects!!

    Kari
    starting 2nd adoption to Ethiopia!

  110. 126

    says

    BTW- if anyone wants to come on over to http://WWW.MYCRAZYADOPTION on Monday- I have a special post ready for adoption fundraisers!! This is another spot to add your Linky Thumbnail and shout out for your adoption projects!!

    Kari
    starting 2nd adoption to Ethiopia!

  111. 131

    says

    I think adoption, period, is wonderful. And maybe someone has already said this but…my husband works for child welfare for our state recruiting foster parents. And I know that SO MANY of these kids end up needing to be adopted. They are orphans and desire forever homes too.

    Please understand I do NOT want to diminish the importance and huge blessing of adopting from outside of our country! I have great respect for those who do and think it's awesome. God calls different families to adopt from different places. Just talking about something my husband (& in turn I) am passionate about!

    Just keep listening to The Voice of Truth and you'll hear the when, why, how, and where, Kristin!

  112. 132

    says

    I think adoption, period, is wonderful. And maybe someone has already said this but…my husband works for child welfare for our state recruiting foster parents. And I know that SO MANY of these kids end up needing to be adopted. They are orphans and desire forever homes too.

    Please understand I do NOT want to diminish the importance and huge blessing of adopting from outside of our country! I have great respect for those who do and think it's awesome. God calls different families to adopt from different places. Just talking about something my husband (& in turn I) am passionate about!

    Just keep listening to The Voice of Truth and you'll hear the when, why, how, and where, Kristin!

  113. 135

    says

    We adopted our daughter 7 years ago from China. At that time I was comforted by the idea that adoption wasn't God's plan B for me since, well, my own fertility would have been plan A. After reading the blog post that adoption is plan B, I wept because of the loss for my daughter. Although God intended for families to stay together, He knew she would need a family some day. In fact the month she was conceived is the month we turned in our application for adoption.

    My husband and I have invested 4 years in our church to help increase awareness of God's call for us, the church, to care for the fatherless. In the last year (or at lease since the Haiti earthquake) I have begun to think that maybe it's better for orphans to remain in their birth culture and that adoption/foster should be encouraged and taught in other cultures. In July, my son and I will be traveling to Kenya with World Orphans. They are committed to supporting indigenous churches in the care of orphans.

    On another note, please check out this conference coming to Austin, TX in October. It will be amazing! Together For Adoption http://www.togetherforadoption.org/?page_id=11. I would love to see you there.

    Anita

  114. 136

    says

    We adopted our daughter 7 years ago from China. At that time I was comforted by the idea that adoption wasn't God's plan B for me since, well, my own fertility would have been plan A. After reading the blog post that adoption is plan B, I wept because of the loss for my daughter. Although God intended for families to stay together, He knew she would need a family some day. In fact the month she was conceived is the month we turned in our application for adoption.

    My husband and I have invested 4 years in our church to help increase awareness of God's call for us, the church, to care for the fatherless. In the last year (or at lease since the Haiti earthquake) I have begun to think that maybe it's better for orphans to remain in their birth culture and that adoption/foster should be encouraged and taught in other cultures. In July, my son and I will be traveling to Kenya with World Orphans. They are committed to supporting indigenous churches in the care of orphans.

    On another note, please check out this conference coming to Austin, TX in October. It will be amazing! Together For Adoption http://www.togetherforadoption.org/?page_id=11. I would love to see you there.

    Anita

  115. 137

    says

    I've thought about adopting, but what stops me is that children deserve a mother AND a father, and someone who doesn't have a ton of problems. I'm afraid that adopting (in MY case) may be too selfish of me. My desire to be a mom would only ruin a child's life not enhance it. So, I'm trying to accept the fact that it's not meant to be.

    I fully support adoption for those who can be a good parent to the children they adopt.

  116. 138

    says

    Thank you for supporting adoption so much! My son's adoption (domestic) will be finalized next week! And support from people like you is how it is possible!

  117. 139

    says

    We have adopted 16 children from all over the US. We had 5 bio kids and filled our house up with love,laughter and tears. While
    most people our age are planning their retirement, we are still changing diapers and getting up in the middle of the night for feedings. (and not our own feeding) : ) Adopting is not for the faint of heart, that is for sure. It is emotionally demanding, finacially taxing, but very much worth it all. We are part of an adoption and foster family support group and our catch phrase is-Not everyone is called to adopt, but everyone is called to care.

  118. 140

    niki says

    I read this post awhile ago, but I can’t stop thinking about it. We are in the middle of the adoption process (actually we are technically in the home stretch..the baby comes July 29th). And through this journey it has opened up my eyes. The birth parents of our baby are disadvantaged teens, babies themselves. And yet through God and a loving Christian “mentor” they decided to keep the baby and give it up for adoption. I was born to teen parents and so was my husband. Ironic, huh? Our families both struggled with the effects of trying to raise a family on next to nothing and giving up so much to do it. 30 years later there are still so many teens in the same situation.

    Adopting this baby will help 3 people: the baby will get a better home, the bio mother and father will get a second chance at breaking out of a cycle of poverty, crime, and drugs.

    But what about all the others?

    I am thinking and praying on how we can help other pregnant teens and teen mothers…

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