Discovering Your Child’s Heart {Giveaway}

*Updated with Winner* Wow, I’m so glad I’m not alone in this parenting journey! Congrats to Cariann, our winner. I highly recommend the Family Matters parenting resources to everyone else!

My kids are like night and day. NIGHT and DAY. My firstborn daughter is strong. She is confident and she isn’t easily deterred. She likes to be in charge and doesn’t like to be told no. Her baby sister is a lot like her.

My son is in the middle. He is sensitive, a pleaser, a peacemaker. He wants everyone to get along and often gives up his own desires to make his sisters happy.

My kids are different, but by default, I parent them all the same.

And in the words of Dr Phil (who I do not watch on purpose) “How’s that working out for you?”

Um, some days, not so great.

I’m not intentionally parenting them all the same, I just haven’t known a better way and I even when I try to do it differently, I often slip back into it. Until now.

I’m a long-time fan of Grace Based Parenting. A couple of years ago, I shared their books and gave some away on my blog. Family Matters contacted me and asked if I wanted to try out a new tool to discover the heart of your child and parent to their uniqueness. I jumped at the chance. I don’t feel like I’m a bad parent, but I’m always open to becoming a better one.

Family Matters sent me this family tool smartly disguised as a family game: The Kids Flag Page.

The Kids Flag Page is a fun way for moms and dads to interact with their kids and truly discover the heart of each child—who God created them to be. When you follow the simple, step-by-step instructions to complete your child’s Flag Page and read the information in the accompanying book, you will:

  • Discover the unique way God wired each of your children and how to best relate to them.
  • Find the six key things that motivate your child – what they love the MOST about life.
  • Connect with the heart of your child.
  • Learn the do’s and don’ts of how to motivate, encourage, discipline and help each child succeed in life.
  • Learn a comprehensive strategy for raising your kids in the power of God’s grace.
  • Find out how to bring the best out of your strong-willed kids.

We took our kids out separately and “played the game” to discover their “countries.” I was amazed at the results! My hubby and I are reading the accompany book and trying to implement some of the discoveries.

I highly recommend this tool for every family.

Family Matters is giving away The Kid’s Flag Page today to a reader. Retail value $44. Please leave a comment telling me why this would be helpful for your family.

This giveaway ends on Thursday.


Comments

  1. 2

    says

    I definitely NEED this! I’m the same way with trying to figure out how to parent each child in ways that work for them best. I’m just not sure exactly how to figure that out. I like Grace Based Parenting, as well, so I think this would be helpful.

  2. 3

    says

    We have four girls… a singleton and then 17 months later our triplets arrived. We strive to treat them as individuals and not collectively, but with 4 all girls ages 5, 3, 3, and 3 it is often difficult to do. This would be a wonderful resource!! Thanks for the chance!

  3. 4

    says

    Sounds so neat. I love that idea of it being interactive with the kids. I find that my parenting is needing to shift and change so much right now with my 7 year old. It seemed so easy parenting a 2 year old and a 6 year old, but all of the sudden they are miles apart. That 7 year old girl is seemingly needing a whole new operating system, almost over night! This seems like a cool tool to try to figure it all out. Thanks for the opportunity!

  4. 5

    says

    I’ve tried reading the book on kids’ 5 love languages, but I think this tool with a hands-on approach with the game would be an even better approach for my family.

  5. 7

    Niki Blake says

    Wow…our children are just like yours….well, mostly. We have three boys (14, 12 and 4) and the oldest is very strong-willed and our middle is very much the peacemaker…the “pleaser”. Our little guy is still too young for us to really get a good read of his temperament but my husband and I believe he will be a little bit of both of his brothers. :) We also parent our boys very much the same way….even though they are so different. How fun would it be to do this game with all of them and see what their “country” will be? It would be especially fun to do with our 4-year-old as we constantly joke that we haven’t had enough parenting years with him to mess him up too badly yet! :) Our boys are a tremendous blessing who have brought so much joy to our life……thanks for the opportunity to receive this!

  6. 8

    says

    I have a four year old daughter and a six year old son. I am amazed at how different my children are! Today though was an example of Things not going well. I truly could use this game to help me guide my children on the right path.

  7. 9

    says

    Isn’t it amazing how children raised under the same roof are COMPLETE opposites. Like you, I would welcome any tool to help be a better parent.

  8. 10

    JK says

    My oldest daughter is sweet and sensitive but “falls apart easily”. My husband and I are clueless how to help her, compared to her younger sister who is determined and even-tempered. We get quite frustrated at times. Thank you.

  9. 11

    says

    hey! this tool sounds awesome! we, too, are huge fans of grace based parenting. LOVE that book. however, our kids are also very different. and we’re blessed to have bio and adopted kids. just today we were saying, we need to find each of their “currencies.” because right now, it ain’t workin’! :) thanks for trying this out!
    meredith

  10. 12

    says

    Wow, this looks like an excellent resource! I have 5 (soon to be 6) kids and boy do I know that what works w/ one doesn’t work with the other. I have been reading several Grace-based parenting books over this past year which has been a big parenting shift for me. I would love to have this game for our game night and see how my kids are different (and see if I’ve viewed them correctly or not!)

  11. 13

    says

    I would love to have this! We have a 8 year old girl and a 3 year old boy. Parenting our daughter is our biggest struggle right now. I struggle with the best way to parent and channel her spirit and her will. Would love any tools to help us with her, and this looks great!
    Thanks for hosting!
    Marty

  12. 14

    says

    I will do anything to try and figure this parenting thing out! I recently challenged myself to apply the 5 love languages concepts to my children and husband each day. It was interesting, but I think I missed something.

  13. 15

    says

    I am a mother of four kids, and it amazes me how different they really do react to discipline. Right now we are trying to figure out our 2 1/2 year old … and this would be WONDERFUL! It would be great for all of our kids, but especially her, because we are at a loss (hubby says she’s a stinker). :)

  14. 16

    Lindsey says

    Oh, Please!!!! I have four very dramatic children, but one in particular who baffles me. I think whatever “country” she is from, it isn’t on Earth.

  15. 18

    says

    This sounds so interesting. My two children and very different. My daughter is very strong-willed and like your son, my son tends to give up what he wants so that she won’t be upset. I would be interested to see what this tool could tell us.

  16. 19

    Kaitlin says

    Our kids are little, so we’re just now getting to the point where we really need to tailor our parenting. I’m particularly interested in the results that my middle kiddo (also a boy sandwiched in between two strong-willed girls) would get in a “game” like this. Thanks for the heads-up, though – it sounds like something that we would definitely look into, anyway (our Sunday School did a whole Grace-based parenting series – loved it!)

  17. 20

    Michelle says

    I would love this as my two children are so different! Even at a young age, I can tell the major differences between their personalities. And like you, I find myself parenting them the exact same way.

  18. 21

    says

    What a neat concept! My girls are very different, as well. Sometimes, we struggle to treat them in the ways they each need to be treated. Any strategies would be helpful!

  19. 22

    Lorie says

    This would be good for our family cause, like you said, each child is different & shouldn’t necessarily be parented the same way. My baby girl is so different from my big boy. Thanks for the chance to win.

  20. 23

    Josh Adams says

    We have 3 kids and already see a huge difference in all 3 (boy 6, girl 4, and boy 2). We could always use help in parenting. Great giveaway idea!

  21. 24

    Kara says

    Our four boys are drastically different, and we could really use the help on learning to parent each of them the way they need from us. The same mode is definitely not working for all of them – especially our third son – age 5. Love that this tool is set up in a game format – perfect way to learn where each of them are coming from!

  22. 26

    Brenda says

    Oh, how I would love to get my hands on this. My husband is currently deployed to Afghanistan and single parenting is a tough job. Our daughters are 7 and 4. Parenting our oldest is such a struggle for me–we are so different in the way we approach life. I would love any tool that would help me understand her better (and our other daughter too) and assist me in “training her up in the way SHE should go.” Thanks for sharing this resource.

  23. 27

    says

    Wow this sounds very interesting! As a mother to 4 and soon to be 5 daughters, it would be nice to know how each of them need parented… I know they are very different in who they are, but how to effectively lead and guide them to their strengths would be amazing!

  24. 28

    Brenda says

    Oh, how I would love to get my hands on this. My husband is currently deployed to Afghanistan and single parenting can be a tough job. Our daughters are 7 and 4. Parenting our oldest is a real struggle for me at times–she is so different from me in the way she approaches life. I would love any tool that would help me understand her better (and her little sister too) and assist me in “traning her up in the way SHE should go.” I’m currently reading through Grace Based Parenting and finding so much insight there. Thanks for sharing this resource.

  25. 29

    says

    I would LOVE something like that! First off, I find personalities facinating (loved Personality Plus – but I have trouble categorizing me kids into just the four offered), second, I have twins who have very different personalities and who I KNOW need different parenting. Third, I know that all three of my girls need different things and I feel like sometimes my method isn’t working for any of them!

    *Also love Grace Based Parenting. Fun finding other people that have read it :)

  26. 30

    says

    Because I need all the help I can get! ;-) Seriously though, my son is such a different personality from me (in good ways–outgoing and positive) so I don’t quite know how to parent him. Sounds like this would be a big help, thanks for the chance!

  27. 31

    Gwyn says

    We have 4 children. And sometimes we think that when something works with one of them, it should work for all of them. And then we are surprised when it backfires with another. Whew! “Fair” isn’t always the same, is it?

  28. 33

    says

    We have 5 children, 4 adopted and 5 distinctly different personalities. I would love to be able to relate to my children in the way that would best fill each child’s cup!

  29. 34

    says

    This would be a great help to me in more than one way. We’ve got 2 children, fairly young, and it would be great to learn this process before I’m too set in my ways of parenting. We’ve plan to have a large family (I’m the oldest of 10), and this will come in handy for years to come. And we’re a military family, so anything that eases the process of parenting alone for large spans of time, will be immensely helpful.

  30. 35

    Sarah says

    I would love to try this! I have a 5 year old daughter who thinks she is 16 and a 17 mo. old son who can say about 6 words and thinks he is king…..heaven help me!!

  31. 36

    Paula says

    I think this book would be helpful due to the large gap between my boys. We have a 14 yr old and a 3 yr old.

  32. 38

    Brenda says

    Oh, how I would love to get my hands on this. My husband is currently deployed to Afghanistan and single parenting is a tough job. Our daughters are 7 and 4. Parenting my oldest is a struggle for me as she and I are very different. I would love any tool that would help me to understand her (and her little sister too) better and train them up in the way God wants them to go. I’m actually reading through Grace Based Parenting right now and have found lots of wisdom there. Thanks for sharing this resource.

  33. 39

    says

    So cool. Does it have an a suggested age? My oldest two are 8 and 6, and seeing as school is almost out and my 6-year-old is driving me CRAZY lately with bad attitude and disrespectfulness and I feel like I’m getting no where with him no matter how hard I try … I’m interested.

  34. 40

    says

    We have 2 boys 4 1/2 and 7 1/2… right now we are struggling with control and anger issues between the boys… some days I can’t figure out which direction to go with them. I think this could help find a general direction to get them back on a positive track.

  35. 41

    says

    I have 4 blessings…. 9, 7, 4 and 2. The first 3 are girls and the last one is a little boy. They are alll soooo different and of course my husband and I were bothed raised totally different. We both want to know how to parent each one the way they need to and the way that the Lord wants us to. We would love this! Thanks for reading

  36. 42

    says

    we’ve got 5 kiddos now, with the 6th one due to arrive this fall, so we know lots about how different kids from the same parents can be. it’s incredible! i would love to find out more about what makes them each unique with this fun-looking tool. count me in!
    thanks and blessings!
    shana

  37. 43

    Sharalyn says

    Ok, I would love this! We struggle with getting our son to share with us, but he loves projects and such, so this looks perfect to get a better view into his world. Thanks!

  38. 45

    says

    I definitely can see distinct personalities in my little ones, but any greater insight I can get into parenting would be wonderful!

  39. 46

    says

    LOVE this giveaway. Either way I will be checking out this resource.

    Not a huge surprise, but all 4 of my kids are so dang different {well technically my 7 month old is different because she’s a baby, but nevertheless :)} I want to be so intentional about seeing my children in light of who God has created them to be, even if I don’t understand it, I want {And long to} appreciate how they are woven. This would be a great resource.

    So great.

  40. 47

    says

    As a homeschooling momma I totally see my children as being night and day different, but I haven’t found the right tool to find out what makes my kids tick. We would use this. Oh I hope I win!

  41. 48

    says

    This looks awesome!!! I too fall into the rut of treating my children the same even though I can see that it’s not working so well! I would love to be able to figure out what makes each of my kids “tick”. I hope I win!

  42. 49

    says

    Oh my gosh! What perfect timing—today we have had a total family meltdown—this is not the way I envisioned our family but we seem to be at a loss as to what to change!

  43. 50

    Angela W. says

    This would be so helpful! I have two boys right now (praying for more kiddos) and they are completely different, except they both make A LOT of noise. I can tell they are different but knowing what to do with that is beyond me. I would love some help.

  44. 52

    Carmen says

    I’d love to have this as a great resource. With two small kids, I struggle to find what really “speaks” to each of them. I too want be a better parent today than I’ve been in the past. This would really help point out the different things I should be doing to reach that goal.

  45. 53

    says

    My kids are polar opposites! My son is relaxed and laid back… my daughter… a drama queen. I would love to know their hearts and nurture them with the things that are most important to them.

  46. 54

    says

    My oldest is already a mystery to me and he is still so young! He guards his thoughts and experiences so carefully and while I want to respect his privacy, I wish I could figure out ways to help him open up to me more. This sounds like a great way to do that–he does love games!

  47. 55

    Jennifer says

    I am trying not to tear up right now. My husband and I were just talking the other night about this subject and how one of boys just has us boggled on how to reach his heart. He just seems like he’s on the out skirts of our family, and we have been unsuccessful in getting him involved. BTW he is not even a teen yet.

  48. 56

    says

    I would love to have this. We have four kids and each of them is a puzzle to me. This looks like a fun tool to help learn their personalities.

  49. 57

    says

    I read Grace Based Parenting last year with my small group and would love to win this give away. I have two children who are seven years apart and who have two very different personalities. My husband and I need all the wisdom we can get and would love this tool to be better parents to our children.

  50. 58

    CA Girl says

    Oh how we would love and appreciate this tool! Our two girls are so different, and what works with the first doesn’t with the second, and vice-versa. We are trying to figure it all out but it isn’t easy. ;)

  51. 59

    says

    I have three little ones very close in age. I have a 6 year old daughter, and 4 year old twin boys. Because they are so close in age (or are the same age) I often just parent/discipline them all the same. I am constantly reminding myself that equity is not “sameness”…anyway, i would love some insight into parenting my kiddos differently according to their strengths, needs, and personalities. :)

  52. 60

    Mikaila says

    This sounds wonderful!
    It would be helpful to my family because…
    I am a step-mommy-to-be and I’ve been a live-in caregiver for a year and a half. This weekend I move in to a brand new place and start a new role, so to speak, that includes picking my little guy up every day and spending the afternoon with him. He’s been in my life for 4 years but I’m super anxious and ecxited to keep building on what we have. He’s 8, which sounds like the perfect age for this game. :)

  53. 61

    Patricia Hardy says

    This sounds like a truly great tool that can be so practically applied. My kids are quite different (one girl and one boy). The other big issue that we have is that they are 6 years apart – so they always want to be parented the same (good and bad). I would think that it would be beneficial for my kids to even know what they are like and what things may work for them better than their sibling. Thanks for hosting such a useful giveaway.

  54. 62

    says

    This would be helpful to me because I have 4 very different kids (3 boys and a girl). I parent them the same, most of the time. When I recognize different needs, I struggle to be consistent. I’d love some help.

  55. 63

    says

    for me, children naturally look for role models to shape their attitudes and behaviors. As parents, it is important for us to make sure that they have plenty of positive responsibility models. Yeah sometimes they have different attitudes but as I can see you managed them well. I love this article..kudos!

  56. 64

    says

    I would love to try this with my kids! This is an area that I struggle in as well. I always wanted to be a wife and mom…but it has been much harder than I ever anticipated! :) My oldest and I kind of clash at times and I would love to figure out how to connect with her in a better way!! Thanks for sharing about this resource!

  57. 65

    Henita Riesen says

    In this journey with 1 son and 3 younger daughters, it is often difficult to define their different strengths and weaknesses, and approach it fairly. This would truly help to make it more visual and make the application more efficient… It is always good to get a fresh approach to our purpose as parents.
    A blog reader in Germany…

  58. 67

    says

    Wow, this is exactly the kind of thing we could really use for our daughter. We’ve just been discussing how nothing seems to motivate her — and I’ve been stuck in the lazy-parenting circle for awhile. I need to break out of that and really be intentional about my parenting. It’d be a great read this summer before she transitions to middle school (assuming that’s not too late!).

  59. 69

    says

    we have 5 young children and they all seem so different, I know that at times some things work, and others don’t, I just don’t know really for which one what works!! THis would be a huge help!!

  60. 72

    Ann says

    I can so relate to your blog about parenting different personalities. My two boys are a year apart and are so completely different in every way…even their sleeping and eating patterns! I think this would be an amazing game for my family. More often than I should admit my husband and I but heads over how we each react to the boys. One is super active, into every sport, and honestly a real challenge for us. My other son is very quiet…too quiet, a push over, sometimes I feel like he fades into the back ground because his brother is constantly seeking attention either positive or negative. So anyway I think this game would be a wonderful way for us to spend time getting to know their heart, getting to know them more as a person, and teaching us how to be a better parent meeting both of their needs.

  61. 74

    april says

    This would be so helpful for our family. I have two girls…..and they are like night and day. The most difficult task for me as a parent is raising them as a part of a Christian family…..I didn’t grow up in a Christian home and don’t want to model my parenting on my own experience of growing up. (I had great parents that raised me in a very moral home with high values, but Christ was missing….and I don’t want to mess that up for my kids.) I also fall into the trap of parenting my girls the same……but they are SO different. I struggle (almost daily) with motivating them and reaching them………constantly trying to figure out what makes them tick so that I can parent them better. What a great tool for learning my kids strengths and weaknesses and motivations…….Thanks for the great giveaway!!!!

  62. 75

    Julie says

    I’m often concerned that my much, much younger son will be either spoiled or overshadowed by his much, much older siblings. This tool sounds like a lot of fun and a lot of help at the same time.

  63. 76

    says

    Oh, I’d LOVE this. I have two preschoolers who are night and day too! All insight into who God has created them to be would be much appreciated. What a great giveaway. This is exactly the kind of stuff I love.

  64. 78

    Megan F says

    I love this tool! It would be so helpful for our family especially since our boys are completely different and helping them and us learn how to shine would be awesome.

  65. 79

    says

    It is so true about parenting our kids the same. Why do we do that? I would LOVE to learn how to best meet each of my children’s individual needs.

  66. 80

    Amber says

    What a wonderful idea! My husband and I have 2 little boys with very different personalities as well. I’m sure this would be a wonderful tool to decipher their similarities and differences and be intentional about the way we parent. Thanks for the opportunity to win!

  67. 81

    Alex Hall says

    I could definitely use this game! I have #6 on the way and am very similar to you in that I parent all 5 of my very different children the same way……

  68. 82

    Emily C says

    We only have our first little girl, but are hoping for a second soon…and then a third…and a fourth someday. I’m a teacher and know how difficult it is to “parent” a class of 25 personalities and could use this tool for so many ways. I love that it’s disguised!

  69. 83

    Jennifer says

    Oh heavens! My husband and I are in counseling and have been since September, I am also in individual counseling for childhood issues that affect my ability to love him and our 4 kids. I can’t even begin to say how much one of these kits would help us to better direct our parenting. I LONG for God to be a strong presence in our family and think this would start us on a better chance of being a Spirit led house.

    • 83.1

      Lisa Palmer says

      Im very proud of you for going to counselling. Hoping its Christ based. I also long for God to be ever present in our home. Thankfully we can be sure that it is His will. God bless you and your family.

  70. 84

    says

    Our children have all been born in different countries, coming to us through adoption…minus our first son. Their personalities are all so different, and sometimes it’s tough to figure them out. Sounds like this could be fun, and give us some insight on how to reach our kids, especially our strong-willed little guy. I know if we channel his energy and persistance, he will do those great things God has lined up for him!!

  71. 86

    says

    What a wonderful resource! We just had baby #4. My first two are so close in age that I constantly struggle with not expecting exactly the same from each of them. Plus my son tends to copy his older sister, also making us forget how different they really are at the core.

  72. 87

    says

    I don’t usually comment for givaways, but this one hit home. This has been something on my heart lately- to train my kiddos each in the way God created them! With 4 ( ages 11 down to 4), I often feel myself treating them all the same, but I know in my heart that this will only go so far. I don’t want to go so far- I want to go all the way!! I want to raise each of them to be what God intended. I think as parents its overwhelming to think of how to parent many kids differently. This would be a phenomemal tool!!

  73. 88

    says

    My oldest just turned 4 and my youngest is 2, but we’re planning to homeschool and I have heard so much about figuring out how your children learn in order to teach them in the way they learn best. This would be really helpful!

  74. 89

    Pauline Roy says

    I’ve got three kids – all totally different. I think I figured things out for the first, but what worked for the first isn’t working for the second, and I worry I’m not reaching him. The third is only 18m and at this point is still just a joyful bundle, so we’re just waiting to figure him out. Thanks for doing this. Tools like this are awesome and so helpful!

  75. 90

    Holli T. says

    My children are very different from one another as well. I have one who fights discipline tooth and nail and one who is immediately heart-broken and repentant. I would love the opportunity this game would give us to see their hearts in a different perspective.

  76. 91

    Amy S says

    Like you I don’t feel I’m a bad parent but am always looking for ways to become a better parent. We have 4 children ages 13 to 7 and would love the opportunity to gain insight into the person God created them to be. Thanks for offering the giveaway and for all you do to reach hearts for Him!

  77. 92

    Susan Forthman says

    We have three children. Our oldest daughter is 7 and we have 3 year old twin, boy-girl. The girls have been easier to figure out what works with them. But we are struggling with our son. This would be a wonderful tool and help us learn our children. Thanks for this great giveaway!

  78. 93

    Jen C says

    That seems really cool. We have 6 kids and I know I parent them all the same… would love a fresh perspective and helpful insights :-)

  79. 94

    Sheila says

    I have two girls, the first very protective and sensitive and the second outgoing. I would love to learn more about their unique qualities and how they are “wired” – this looks like a great tool! Plus, my oldest loves games!

    Thanks!

  80. 95

    karen says

    I have almost the same set of kiddos as you…a 12yo strong willed daughter, a 10yo peacemaker son, and a crazy 3yo. Things have been very difficult with our almost-teen lately, and I definitely see a need in parenting my boys differently than my daughter. I have recently been reading The 5 Love Languages of Teenagers and the Love and Logic parenting series. I would LOVE any other input, especially faith based! Please select us for this giveaway!! Thank you!! ~Karen

  81. 97

    Traci says

    I would love this game! My firstborn seems to be the strong willed type as well, but then again what 4 yr olds aren’t! My second seems to be a little softer, but he is only a year. We are trying to raise the first generation of Christians in our family. I can see that this game would be a great help!

  82. 98

    says

    We have four children, 1 to 11, two girls, two boys. We too, have been parenting the only way we know- sadly not so successfully with our son. I just purchased a few parenting books from our local Christian Book Store in the hopes that we could find someway to figure out how he ticks… this game looks fabulous! I would love to try it.

  83. 99

    Racheal says

    I parent my son, the only way I really know how. He is our only child, so far. I feel as though we are failing many days. It seems we have a VERY strong willed little guy. I am open to better ways of parenting him, but really don’t know what to do with him, it seems no form of discipline works with him. He is such a joy, but also at the same time a challenge.

  84. 100

    Alica says

    I have four children ages 4, 6, 8, 10 and they are all so different. I am always looking for ways to understand them better and to be a better mom to them. Thanks for all you do. We love The Family Room.

  85. 102

    Amy Beckman says

    I love learning and focusing on a child’s strengths, seeing them as half full as opposed to half empty. This would be a GREAT tool to help understand how each child is wired so I can work with my children better and not get frustrated at them for how they respond to life. I highly recommend a book by Jenifer Fox called How to Discover and Develop Your Child’s Strengths.

  86. 103

    says

    I would love this for my family because my children are totally different and I, like you, am always looking to become a better parent.

  87. 104

    Kimberly says

    Oh my word – how could it NOT help in my family?! I think it will be especially helpful with our next child – we are in the process of adopting an older child from foster care. A tool like this would help us move that learning curve up!
    Pick me! Pick me!

  88. 105

    says

    This would be great since I, too, have night and day children. The night and day ones are boys. And it creates much sibling rivalry!! One is super strong-willed and often leaves me exasperated!!!

  89. 106

    says

    Wow! This sounds great. As a Mom to 5 kids (3 biological, and 2 foster children), I know firsthand just how different children can be. With our foster children, I do not have the luxury of having known them their whole life; knowing their likes and dislikes, what motivates them, etc. Sounds like a great game! : )

  90. 107

    Sarah Zimmerman says

    Oh, I’d love to have this resource! We’ve been struggling with our rambunctious boy (the only one w/ 3 sisters, 2 being twins). I’m at a loss as how to truly reach him since he is wired so differently from his sisters and I grew up with no brothers. Thank you for offering this to us!

  91. 108

    Amanda says

    What a great idea! We have 3 kids and they are SO different–I can even tell with the 19 month old–she’s the one that’s the most unique in the whole family! Sounds like a fun and productive activity.

  92. 109

    says

    I love how you phrased it, about not being a bad parent but being open to being a better one. That is exactly how I feel. My little ones are still pretty young but I want to truly reach their hearts!

  93. 110

    says

    I would love to win this! Like you, Kristen, I have a headstrong oldest, a peacemaker middle and a younger child who I have no idea about just yet. I’d love to figure out how to reach all of them effectively.

  94. 111

    Carrie C says

    This would be so great for my family! My daughter has always been spirited and maybe this will help me to relate to her and guide her more productively!

  95. 112

    says

    What a wonderful resource. Our children are very different too. We have two strong-willed ones like bookends to our middle, peacful child. I worry about overlooking him as we focus so much on the squeaky wheels. I also think any tool that forces us to be intentional in our parenting is extremely helpful! What a great giveaway!

  96. 114

    says

    Oh my word, this sounds like an amazing resource. My children, also, are so very different. One is a whole lot like me (so I sometimes relate to him better than my other child) I need tools and information and most of all God’s guidance. So thank you for the give-away!

  97. 115

    Barbara says

    My oldest has some mental health challenges and I’ve grown so accustomed to how to parent him that I don’t know what’s normal anymore for my youngest. I am always open to any help!

  98. 116

    says

    WOW….this sounds like an amazing adventure to dive into the lives of our children! We are a family that loves games and I am always wanting to learn more about each of my three! Thank you for sharing about this game!

  99. 117

    Karen says

    As soon as my second was born 10 months ago, I could tell the difference between her and my oldest. I would love to have somehting like this to help now and in years to come.

  100. 118

    Sharilyn says

    I have 5 children, with another one due this month, and would love this resource. Thanks so much!

  101. 120

    AmberK says

    My name is Amber and I’m TOTALY excited about this opportunity!!!!!
    We have three children-15, 8 and 5. They are all boys. None of the three of them are the same. I’m a mom, a girl, to three boys. I don’t really ‘get’ them all the time…Moms, girls I mean, are different than sons, I mean boys. And just for the record, I throw their daddy in there, too! ha ha
    I’d love, love, love to know what they’re thinking and find alternative ways to get to really know them and what God is placing in their hearts and a more productive way for their dad and I to interact with them individually…Oh how I would love that peace and fun!! :) This is a really, really great giveaway and someone is about to be very blessed by this!

    Thank you for sharing!
    AmberK

  102. 123

    says

    It is my belief that God doesn’t make our kids alike in any way for 2 reasons… 1. b/c it keeps us so dependent on Him. 2. b/c He’s got a really good sense of humor. :) This is a great gift. Thanks Kristen. Have a great day.

  103. 124

    says

    This looks so fun! I just, in the last 24 hours became a mother of TWO teenagers…and with 4 (soon to be 5) kids, I love any insight, and means of obtaining it, into my kids personalities and giftedness. This looks fun!

  104. 125

    Michelle says

    My kids are also polar opposites, and like you, i parent them the same. But what works for one does not work for the other….this sounds like a great tool to get to know your child and hopefully learn some tolls to parent them more effectively! Sounds fun!!

  105. 126

    Jabber Jaws says

    I would love this! I have four kids with a ten year age span so parenting the same isn’t really an option but what I worry about is lazy parenting – you know, only doing the band aid approach to get through and not teaching life lessons when needed.

  106. 127

    Sadie says

    I would love to have this. As a mom of 4 and on our way to adopting more I read and use anything that I can get my hands on that can possibly get me one step closer to the mom God wants me to be for each of my kids.

    Thanks for your blog!

  107. 128

    Tonya Joubert says

    Wow, what a tool this could prove to be! As other moms, I am always looking to improve my parenting skills. I have 3 boys ranging from 9 years old to 3 years and there are no words to describe how very different they are. About the only thing they have in common is their love for dirt, bugs, and messes.

    Thank you for your blog too, I always look forward to reading it during my ten minutes of quiet each night.

  108. 129

    Laura says

    I have five kids. They are each as different as night and day. I would love to win this give away to try to figure them all out a little better!

  109. 131

    Amy T. says

    Oooooooh…….My husband and I were JUST Talking about our kids and how different each one is and talking about how we can meet the need of each one and encourage them and fan their flames in the way THEY need it. It’s been amazing to see that each one needs something different. I NEEEEEEED this!!!!

  110. 132

    says

    we have ALWAYS struggled at finding what motivates and how to discipline – ours is so strong willed and so different from any kids we know – we also don’t have family around for that “helping hand of advice”

    this would be an amazing gift.

  111. 133

    Melanie says

    I need this – I have 3 boys and they are different like night and day and something else? – midday? lol.

    Melanie

  112. 134

    says

    Like you, Kristen, my kids are totally night and day…..something that amazes me daily! Our daughter is 10 and she’s our quiet, reserved, don’t-draw-attention-to-me one. Whereas our son, who’s 6, is outgoing, loud, and could become friends with a tree stump.

    I have been trying to be very intentional in how we’re parenting Emma since she’s reaching what I belive is a very critical age for girls. I’m reading Preparing Your Daughter For Every Woman’s Battle and really bombarding her w/God’s truths about His love for her and how He views and created her. I know I’m going to screw something up and I don’t want it to be this!

    Emma and I are also night and day and this giveaway would give me a key to her heart since she’s often not willing to share much.

  113. 135

    Sharon P says

    Enter me in! What a neat idea to learn how to relate to my children in a fun way. It would totally rock if I won..one of my children is very sensitive, and we are at a stand still with ideas (tried them all) on how to change a specific behavior. I would learn how to relate better and hopefully offer new and better ideas on how to deal with his problem.Plus his other brothers and sister would benefit with a better relationship with him too!

  114. 136

    says

    My middle child is our struggle this week. But it could as easily be one of the others next week. They are all so different. My hubby and I are at the end of our ropes in a particular area right now. We just need to find a different way to do things.

  115. 137

    says

    Night and Day…we call our kids Oil and Water! I would be blessed by this information as we enter the Teen years for my son and practice child :) Then it would only benefit the daughter and son that follow. Thanks for your wisdom and insights!

  116. 138

    Laura says

    Oh yes please! I recently returned to working full-time after two years of working from home only part-time. It’s been a hard but necessary adjustment for us all but I really need to get the most from every minute I do have with the kids and this sounds like it would help immensely!

    Laura

  117. 139

    Christa says

    We have 6 children with an incredibly wide array of personalities. Like you, we tend to default to “one style fits all” parenting. What a blessing to use a tool to help us be more purposeful with each child’s own individual style :-)

  118. 140

    Mary Jo says

    What a great idea! I have 1 boy right now (2 1/2 years old), but we definitely plan to have more. I’d love to be a little “ahead of the game” when it comes to knowing and understanding my child’s personality! :)

  119. 141

    Janet says

    What a great tool this would be to help my 8 year old grandson. He has been through a lot the past 3 years; leaving the only home he ever knew, marriages, deaths, family home being broken into more than once, a new sibling, new school and on and on. He is truly struggling with behavior and mom and dad have completely different parenting styles. What a blessing it would be if they could do this and come together for te greater good of this precious kid.

  120. 142

    says

    Your post comes at a perfect time for me. I have recently been reading and researching temperaments and how to parent better based on your child’s temperament. I am wanting to read more this summer so I can be a better parent to my two boys who are pretty much complete polar opposites in personality and temperament. The flag book sounds really cool and I would love to win it! Thanks for all your great posts.

  121. 143

    Amy says

    My two girls are complete opposites in every way. While my oldest is easy-going and pretty “easy” to parent, I am having a much harder time figuring out my youngest. Everything seems to be a struggle with her, and I want to figure out a better way of doing things for her. This tool sounds like it could help.

  122. 144

    Audrey says

    My two boys are four and a half years apart. I struggle with raising them constantly. I tried to remind myself (and my oldest) that when my oldest son was younger, he didn’t have a big brother he had to share me with. I try to treat my 4 year old the same way I treated my 9 year old when he was 4; not the way I treat my 9 year old now. It’s something we all struggle with, and it sounds like this program would be a great help figuring out how to raise each of them differently and nurture their true selves. Thank you.

  123. 145

    says

    hmmm…it would probably be better to ask my almost 8 yr old why this might be good for our family to try out. though i fear what she might say! we have 3 kids, with #4 due in a months time. like you, miss kristen, our oldest and youngest, both girls, are fairly headstrong (the youngest being more so) while the middle, a boy, is the sensitive one. time will tell what this 4th one’s (girl or boy) temperment will be! :) the other added bonus is that we do homeschool so i am constantly with all the kids and it would bless me, and them i am sure, to be a better parent to their particular needs. well, before i sound like a REAL nut case :) i’ll say thanks for the chance and have a blessed day!

  124. 147

    Laura says

    I have 5 kids and never could have imagined that they could ALL be so very different from each other! This would be a wonderful gift!

  125. 148

    says

    Wow…this would be great! I have two kids that are totally different and I am always trying to figure out how to parent each one the way they need and understand best!!

  126. 149

    Vicky says

    My parents never took the time to learn what I as interested in (not saying they were bad parents or anything, that just isn’t how they operate) and therefore encourage me in those things and I want it to be different with my daughter. Lacking and “intentional parent” role model I could use all the help I can get!

  127. 150

    says

    I would love this resource to help me in parenting our three children. My middle child is particularly strong-willed and I have a hard time figuring out what to do with her. I love to celebrate their uniqueness, but finding the best means of motivating and disciplining each of them is not my strength.

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