I closed my eyes as the song wrapped around me. It was Sunday, the week before Christmas and I was at peace.

My hand tugged: My daughter happily gesturing at the holiday song being sung-the one she was learning to play on her flute.

Then I understood the unspoken completeness in my soul, my children were lined up in a row…

worshiping God with us.

Just as they had for the last 8 Sundays, notebook and Bible in hand.

I spent the first ten years of my marriage as a Children’s Pastor.

I loved it.

But once my children turn a certain age (it’s different for each one-our youngest is still in classes at 4), I find myself longing to experience worship along side them.

Eight Sundays ago, we made a family decision to attend worship services together.

A scripture was read and instantly I recognized it as a verse that we recently learned as a family. We added crazy hand motions to help us remember and with a side glance to my kids, I saw them doing the small gestures. It was all we could do not to laugh and burst into spontaneous made-up sign language!

But inside? I was marveling.

The glimpse into my children’s hearts as they listened and learned and loved: it was good. It was like unwrapping The Gift of Christmas together.

I know there is a need in their spirits to learn and grow with kids their own age. So, yes to that.

But I want my children to see my eyes brim with tears when God comes near.

I want them to learn to worship by example.

I want to experience God with them…

P.S. when the fidgeting starts-tic tacs help

Yesterday was my birthday.

I turned 38. Since 40 is the new black, I feel okay about that.

My hubby got me these.

I got myself a new heating pad.

Par-tay.

I started thinking about all the lessons I’ve learned through the years of birthdays:

• I’ve learned you can’t hide vitamins up your nose because they melt and cause your parents to FREAK out (age 4)
• I’ve learned that even your dog won’t eat the fried liver from your plate (Dad’s favorite meal growing up) (age   8
• I’ve learned when your Mom requests prayer for your sick dog, the pastor might laugh. This is a problem. (age 10)
• I’ve learned that when your best friend sneaks Dirty Dancing (the movie) to you at church, you will accidentally leave it at the sign in table and have to go in front of the entire youth group to claim it (age 14)
• I’ve learned that just because you can drive, doesn’t mean you have a car and just because you can date, doesn’t mean you will be asked out (age 16)
• I’ve learned that the first boy you meet on the first day of college could actually be THE ONE. (age 18)
• I’ve learned that not discovering above lesson could cause you to date the wrong people. (age 21)
• I’ve learned to balance my checkbook or call home for a loan. (age 23)
• I’ve learned not to participate in public speaking events when I’m on a fertility drug (age 27)
• I’ve learned that all those rejection letters from book publishers really do develop character (age 29)
• I’ve learned that being a mom is the hardest and greatest job I’ve ever had (age 30)
• I’ve learned that it can happen to you (age 33)
• I’ve learned that pregnancy after 35 is WOW. Oh, the droopage. (age 35)
• I’ve learned to turn around and walk away from my tween’s messy bedroom (yesterday)

My big birthday lesson this year: My plans aren’t nearly as good as God’s and they are called LAUGH LINES not crow’s feet. thankyouverymuch.

What have you learned this year?

But what I’m really asking is HOW OLD ARE YOU??