We were packing the living room, surrounded by a mountain of boxes, when she found it.
Her eyes lit up as she held the white fabric up for size. “Mom, can I try it on? Please.“ My almost 13 year old was holding my almost 18 year old wedding dress buried deep in the entry closet.
I hesitated. Not for sentimental reasons, just because I’m task-oriented and it would be another pause in the long road of packing up our home for the pending move.
But I just couldn’t extinguish her shining eyes. And we needed a break.
I love times like these, the ones where I live in the moment.
I swallowed the lump as I zipped the back of my beaded dress.
Then she turned around:
Her Daddy could hardly speak. A flood of memories, doubts and fears, dreams and expectations assailed me. It was surreal seeing my child, so radiant, wearing my dress. The last day it had been worn was the day I committed my heart and future to her daddy, eyes brimming on the other side of the room.
I couldn’t help but think about that young naive girl so long ago. There are a few things I’d love to tell her today. I will share them with the my daughter standing in front of me when she walks down the aisle in her momma’s wedding dress one day …..
Dear 22 Year Old Me:
This marriage thing is going to be harder than you think. But it’s also going to be better than you could ever imagine. ”Marriage is made in Heaven, but so is thunder, lightening, hail and tornado.” -unknown
The big stuff you’re worried about won’t really matter. It’s the little things you need to know:
- Remember why you fell in love
- Be willing to compromise
- Kiss everyday for various and numerous reasons
- Respect each other
- Laugh when you feel like crying
- Don’t fret the God stuff
- Leave the past behind you
- Lock your bedroom door
- 40 isn’t old
- One day your little girl is going to look amazing in your wedding dress. Breathe.
18 years ago today, we fell in love, after 3 years of being best friends. Remember when we “accidentally” kissed while hugging hello and then got married 10 weeks later?
Yeah, after all these years, I love you even more. The best is yet to come.
the 39.5 year old me