I started this terrible wonderful habit last year.
All three of my kids started a new school and there were some bumpy days in the beginning.
So on the first Friday of the first week, I took my kids to a darling little hometown bakery near our house. And we celebrated with a cookie.
The next week it was a brownie.
A few weeks after that it was a cake pop.
It became a sweet tradition.
And well, many Fridays later and my pants won’t button. It’s a weighty problem.
So a few Friday’s ago, I was backing out of my spot and looking behind me and not at the lovely Mercedes next to me and I scratched the whole side of the car.
That is a bad feeling.
I slowly pulled into my spot (straighter this time) and told my kids to follow me to look for the owner. The car was parked in front of Massage Envy, next to the bakery. So, yeah, I immediately felt worse, of course.
I was about to stress out someone who was having a massage.
I told the gals behind the desk what happened and described the car. They said, yes, the owner was having a massage and I wrote my name and number on a piece of paper. And then the receptionist said, “I can’t believe you came in to find her. You know you could have left. She would have never know.”
The other girls nodded their heads and encouraged me to throw away the paper.
I looked at my kids looking at us, listening and watching what I would say. “I would know. My kids would know.”
They were impressed with how “good” I was.
Really? This is what it’s come to in our world? Being honest about hitting someone’s car when they aren’t looking makes me a good person. Huh.
We left and I told my kids it would have been wrong for me to drive away without telling the truth. I fear there is an entire generation of kids who don’t take responsibility for their actions and wave the “it wasn’t my fault” banner.
Say what you need to say. And do what you say you’ll do. It’s called integrity.
Friends of mine from another country, who are now new Americans made this observation to me, “We’ve noticed that when you mention a new idea or cause, many Americans are so excited! They think it’s a wonderful idea and they want to do everything to help! and share! and give! But many do nothing. All the excitement ends when it’s time to show up. In our country, not many people are interested in new ideas, but at least you know where they stand.
I was embarrassed because they spoke the truth.
Sure things come up and plans change. That’s life. But when we make a habit of hiding the truth or not following through with what we’ve said we will do, we are teaching our children to do the same.
Sometimes we use words.