My Life — We are THAT Family

Welcome to Summer

10:55 pm Bykristen

Well, we made it to the end of the school year.

Barely.

The last two weeks have been exhausting. We’ve been living on whatever’s available in the pantry (don’t judge me) and wearing whatever happens to be clean in the laundry room. Which is the same 4 things for my youngest because I’m also behind on laundry, but still a control freak about what she wears. But not if it’s the same thing over and over, apparently.

My son cleaned out his backpack and found a smashed paper sack lunch from January in the abyss, which sort of explains the random odor. He also pulled out a handful of his favorite pencils, one-inch stubs he’s apparently been writing with since 2010. Gah.

Here’s to weeks without alarm clocks or schedules, to sibling fights, reteaching my children the fine art of sleeping in, wet towels and sunblock in the eyes…

Welcome to Summer

I may never be Mom of the Year (see above), but I am above average at recycling old birthday balloons and a roll of crepe paper.

Sidenote: To all the teachers in our lives: thank you for making this year amazing!

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It’s Like Duck Dynasty, Only With Cows

10:47 pm Bykristen

There aren’t ducks, only plenty of cows.

But we are still happy, happy, happy every time we visit my in-laws farm in Oklahoma.

Since losing my sister-in-law in January, we crave time with family even more.

My husband, Terrell, took the kids and cousins down to one of the ponds to fish and drove grandpa’s truck since the ground was so wet. When my mother-in-law and I finished cleaning the supper dishes, we headed out to join them. Before we got there, we saw everyone hurrying to round up the cattle. The air was tense and my husband shouted, “Something’s wrong.”

My heart stopped as I searched for my kids and tried to figure out what happened.

While they were busy fishing, the cattle surrounded the pickup truck that normally delivers their feed. Terrell didn’t think anything of it until my daughter yelled that one of the cows running away, acting sporadic, had a fishing pole hanging from it’s mouth.

The cow had a giant hook in his tongue and was foaming at the mouth. In a matter of minutes, my 70 year old (next month) father-in-law was in action. He quickly and skillfully separated the injured cow from the herd, with the help of my husband and a few grandsons. They got her in the shoot and carefully located the fishing hook and removed it by attaching a medieval looking device called nose pliers to hold her still.

I think they would be an excellent child rearing tool.

We all sighed in relief and laughed about the biggest catch of the day.

Second biggest:

I didn’t catch any big ones, but I did catch the most (9!) And all the guys were asking me for fishing tips (ha!) So, there’s that.

My kids loved playing with their cousins. And doing the Harlem Shake, of course:

[From left to right]

1. Cousins playing football (skins won) 2. Field of flowers 3. My kids found a turtle (poor thing) 4. Cows (or I like to call them Dinner) 5. My nephew: He thinks he is famous now 6. Sunset 7. My daughter’s playmate 8. Windy Family pic 9. Grandpa passing down a gun to his namesake

The kids swam in a blow up pool for hours. When I went out to check on them, I discovered they were swimming with a family of small frogs they had named Willie, Corry, Si and Mrs. Kate.

And that’s what you call a dynasty.

Or a wart bath.

Whatever.

It was a wonderful weekend and we rode off in the sunset.

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An Opportunity to See More Clearly

9:11 pm Bykristen

I want to tell you a story:

There were two men sharing a hospital room, each struggling to recover from devastating illnesses. Two things made them friends: loneliness and opportunity. One was blind, the other old.

Every day, the old man would describe what was happening at the park, just outside his window to the blind man. He would describe the children playing ball and the young couple arguing on the park bench. His words painted a picture describing the way the wind blew the kite a little girl was flying and the way the trees were blossoming.

Every detail was described. The old man helped the blind man see what he couldn’t.

The day came for the old man to have surgery, but sadly he never returned to the hospital room. He passed away. When the nurse told the blind man the news, he wept. He said nostalgically, “Before you leave Nurse, could you just tell me what’s going on at the park outside the window?”

She opened the blinds to a brick wall, “What park?” she asked.

Sometimes we have to be blind so we can see.

We have the opportunity to make the world a brighter place. We can change someone else’s world with our words and our actions.

Today, I’m going to show you an opportunity to help save someone’s life and I pray you see the world more clearly.

If my 6 year old discovers a tiny hole in her leggings on the way to church, by the time we get home, it’s the size of her head.

It just keeps getting bigger.

Because sometimes once it starts, there’s no stopping it.

I feel like the more good we do in Kenya, the bigger the hole gets. Every time we rescue a new girl at Mercy House (4 more this Spring) or have a new baby (1 newborn and 3 more on the way) for a total of 24 lives in our home by summer, the spiritual attacks increase. Satan is relentless. The more we do, the more work there is to be done.

But the victories are greater.

I know our battle isn’t against flesh and blood, but the attacks often are. It can be discouraging.

The last few weeks have been hard. The kind of hard that makes you want to pull the covers over your head and cry UNCLE.

Many of you who have supported Mercy House since the beginning, know of the personal loss Maureen, our Executive Director, hero and girl rescuer, has endured. She lost her beloved sister and nephew in her immediate family while we were opening the home in 2011 and the battle has been personal.

Jennifer, Maureen’s mom, has been a huge support. She has endured so much loss in her 53 years, but she has been faithful, volunteering her time and skills to help us help girls in Kenya. Our family fell in love with Jennifer several years ago and she is our extended family now.

The day after we rescued our newest girl from the grips of darkness, Jennifer, Maureen’s mom, was diagnosed with a life threatening brain tumor that has already caused her to go blind in one eye and her other eye is at risk and ultimately, her life.

What a blow.

Thankfully, it’s not cancerous and brain surgery will save her life. (She is tentatively scheduled to enter the hospital June 2, 2013)

Most people with her medical condition in Kenya would die. And without a financial or healing miracle, Jennifer does not have a chance. The surgery and recovery cost $15,000.

I have struggled with my faith lately, just feeling overwhelmed and exhausted and a little whiny. I know God is able, but the hole fills up with water quicker than I can bail it out.

What better way for satan to attack the good work of Mercy House than to try and cripple our beloved Maureen?

God keeps asking me to believe for the impossible. Probably because He keeps coming thru. I just want to shake myself and say, “Don’t you get it, Kristen!”

Please, pray, there are obviously many risks involved.

It’s a big hole, but God is bigger.

You can help Jennifer by giving a charitable donation here. You can also follow her journey to healing by liking this Facebook page.

We are grateful to the amazing work of an organization called CURE Kenya, who is helping to facilitate this surgery on the ground.

About CURE:

More than 100 million physically disabled children in the developing world can be cured through surgery.

These children have conditions like clubfoot, bowed legs, cleft lips,untreated burns, and hydrocephalus. Without treatment, they won’t go to school and will have little hope for a future. Many will die from their condition.

That’s why CURE exists. We’re a non-profit organization that operates hospitals and programs in 27 countries worldwide where patients experience the life-changing message of God’s love for them, receiving surgical treatment regardless of gender, religion, ethnicity, or ability to pay.

Since our first hospital opened in Kenya in 1998, we have seen over 1.9 million patients, provided over 138,000 life-changing surgeries, and trained over 6,100 medical professionals.

[We are collecting donations thru third party Pure Charity so they will be tax deductible. We don’t have a way to receive a tax deductible donation via Paypal at this time. If you don’t want to pay with credit card/debit card online, you can send a check here:

Pure Charity

2003 Horsebarn Road, Suite 9

Rogers, AR 72756

in the memo line we would need to have “CURE International 58-2248383, Jennifer’s Brain Surgery”

Will you help one precious life see the world clearly?

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The Best Thing

9:42 pm Bykristen

Recently, I took my daughters on a girl’s weekend with my mom, sister and nieces.

It’s been years since we’ve done anything like this and it was so much fun! We laughed and ate too much. My oldest niece is about to leave for college and she is a wonderful example and friend to my 13 year old. (They were in charge of the luggage rack:)

My 6 year old’s best friend happens to be her cousin, so the little girls had a blast being together. I love the memories we created!

While we were away, my husband took our son on a Passport2Purity Weekend. I cannot recommend this resource enough! I took my daughter on a weekend getaway when she was 11 and it was life changing.

*Passport2Purity is a parent-driven time away together that focuses on talking to your kids about sex and purity. All the hard work is done for you. There are CDs to listen to, a journal to write in and object lessons in the kit. All you need to bring to the table is bravery. *Amazon affiliate link.

“This time together helps build heart-to-heart communication between you and your pre-teen while laying a foundation of purity that will prepare them for the turbulent years ahead.” The latest version has been updated to include teaching that is appropriate for kids being raised in our world of technology.” -Family Life.

Without a doubt, our generation of children deal with incredible sexual exposure, pressure and availability. We cannot simply ignore it and hope our children weather the storm alone. At the end of the weekend (filled with fun and learning), my son signed a purity commitment with his dad and my husband gave him a cool ring to wear to signify the covenant.

When I returned home, my son looked 2 years older.

So did my husband.

It’s not easy for parents to talk about sex, pornography, purity, lust, sexting, aggressive boys and girls, the list goes on, with our kids.

As a matter of fact, it’s one of the hardest things we’ve ever done.

But if we don’t talk to our children and keep the line of communication open, someone else will. We choose to explain God’s standard concerning sex as a preteen so everything they hear later on can be compared to it.

I asked my son what the best part of his weekend was, fully expecting him to say paintball.

He looked at me with wise eyes and said, “The best part of the weekend was discovering how much Dad loves me.”

I can’t think of a better answer.

Filed UnderMy Life, Parenting 8 Comments

Why Mothers Cannot Give Up

9:16 pm Bykristen

My 13 year old has a thing for shoes.

She loves funky and sleek. Modern and cool. Athletic and colorful. She got shoes in her Easter basket, under the Christmas tree, for her birthday and at the start of school. And boots during the rodeo this year. She saves her babysitting money for shoes and if you ask her what she wants or needs at any particular time, she might just say shoes.

Too bad she only has two feet. And they are still growing.

She wanted a pair of sandals for summer since she’d outgrown the last pair and so I brought home cute ones from Target. She liked them and I sighed in relief (because y’all know that’s a big point for mama).

The next week, her brother, who owns a pair of tennis shoes and a pair of cowboy boots (period), needed a new pair of shoes to replace his one battered pair. And that’s like pulling teeth, taking a nearly 11 year old boy shopping, but that’s another story.

We went tennis shoe shopping and without getting into all the details that are nobody’s beeswax, I ended up having an ugly argument with my daughter about shoes.

I huffed and puffed. She lamented and apologized. I realize it was just regular mom/daughter stuff but I felt very defeated about the whole thing that night.

A few days later, I tucked my kids into bed the night before my trip to Kenya. I didn’t cry when I covered up my 6 year old and ran my hands thru her hair. My lip didn’t quiver as I prayed with my son and answered his “what if” questions. By the time I made it to my teenager’s room, I was proud of my stiff upper lip, knowing her age would make her the easiest one to say goodbye to.

She put her book down and scooted over so I could sit on the edge of her bed. That’s when I noticed the bright orange and green posters tacked to her bulletin board. I stood up so I could get a closer look and when I read the titles “Prayer Requests” and “50 Blessings” my resolve broke.

Her lists were precious. I mean absolutely humbling and one of the most beautiful things I have ever read.

How can you not cry when your daughter puts bobby pins, sweet tea and your name on her blessings list?

But it was # 2 on her “Prayer Requests” list that made me do the ugly cry.

We are amateurs in this teen mother-daugther world, she and I. We are learning how to dance through hormonal highs and lows, clothing battles, friendship heartaches and messy rooms. It’s not easy. There have been big fights and bigger apologies. We have cried and prayed and loved each other to understanding.

We both have regrets and pledges to do better and love more.

But we are making progress in the journey and learning a lot about each other in the process. We love each other deeply and are finding new ways to let each other know every day.

When I read #2, “Help me be thankful for my sandals” I knew all the hard work and teaching and crying and praying, all the pouring into, the mistakes and challenges of motherhood were finding their mark.

We cannot give up on our kids because they don’t give up on us. No matter how hard the day or long the road, our consistent love will pay off.

I felt like I met God in my daughter’s room that day and instead of filling her up, He used her bright orange list to encourage me.

#21 on that “50 Blessings” list: sandals.