My husband spent 11 years in a job he sometimes hated.
During those long years, we constantly reminded ourselves to choose joy! to be grateful! to love what we’d be given!
But working to live instead of living to work can be draining.
Especially when you dream of doing something that matters.
We had countless conversations about his sweet spot–that place where passions and skills collide (you know, once we crossed Nascar Driver off the list.) The same words surfaced again and again in our long talks–words like helping people, traveling, discipleship, serving others. We had a big picture dream without a map to get there.
But he kept on doing the last thing God told him to. . . which brings us back to that job.
I’ve always marveled at my husband’s patience. Because his faithful and often unfulfilling work all those years not only provided for our family, but created space for me to pursue life-giving work through writing that resulted in starting Mercy House.
Sometimes it’s hard to see where the road is leading. But God still leads us into the unknown.
God rarely does things the way we think he should.
While we’re waiting to do something important, God is doing something important in us.
He is refining us. He is making us uncomfortable. Dependent. He is revealing His strength in our weakness.
It’s a truth that’s hard to grasp in the middle of the waiting. But it’s truth our heart needs to hear.
Most of Jesus’ life was spent doing what he wasn’t sent to do. He was preparing Himself. And if Jesus needed time to prepare, we do, too.
Story after story in the Bible reminds us how God impositioned his people, only to position them. He made Joseph uncomfortable in a prison to position him on a throne. He made Daniel lion’s food, only to proclaim His glory in the fire. He made Esther prepare her body and heart to be queen, only to position her to save an oppressed people.
And He will do the same with you.
Because it very well might be that the job you hate or the one you can’t find is part of His great plan for your life. He may just use your discomfort to comfort others.
God often impositions us in our work, our health, our lives because he is preparing us to position us to reveal His glory.
I will never forget the day, my husband and I said the words outloud, the dreaming kind that make your heart pound. “What if somehow God made a way for me to quit my job and lead Mercy House?” I cried at his audacity because the weight of the burden was crushing me. We asked it and then we waited a long time for the answer.
It came nearly a year ago, when my husband left his well-paying, tenured position to travel, disciple, and help people in our work to remind women around the world God has not forgotten them.
Don’t think for a minute He has forgotten you either.
We can see now that all those years of being uncomfortable were making a way for us to comfort women around the world.
That uncomfortable place you’re in today? Offer it to Him. Ask God to use it for the comfort of others, for His glory.
He doesn’t waste anything. Even our discomfort.
Ashley says
I cannot tell you how much I appreciate this blogpost. My husband and I are in this exact position. We have begun the process to build a maternity home for troubled mothers. My husband hAs been struggling at his job for almost 10 years and we are praying God will provide a way for him to be here with us, overseeing the maternity home. I know God works all things for our good. But, it was was so encouraging to have that little reminder this morning. Thank you so much!
Ashley
Kris says
This post was for me! It’s like you read my mind and my heart. Thank you for listening to God’s voice and lifting me up through your writing. May He continue to bless you and yours.
Lynette L. says
Thank you for writing this encouraging post! My family is at a crossroads right now. I am recovering from cancer surgery. Both of my children are moving out within two weeks of each other. My husband is self-employed, and he is finding work another state, which might mean a move for the two of us here shortly. I am on the spot on the path of life where I cannot see what is coming next at all, and I am just trusting God 100% to lead the way. All of these things that are happening right now are definitely things that I never would have chosen for my life. I love that you said, “God rarely does things the way we think He should.” I need to make that saying into an art piece and hang it up where I can see it every day!
Stephanie Naidoo says
Hi Lynette
Was reading your comment from 2015.
I live in South Africa.
My name is Stephanie.
I just wanted to know how you are doing now after your surgery..
Kind regards
Stephanie Naidoo
Kristie Michaelson says
Beautifully said~ Thank you for Sharing your heart, it touched mine~
Heidi says
This. Yes. Too much to say in a public forum like this, but yes . . . we’re also currently wondering about this season. When I first saw this on Twitter last night I had to stop what I was doing to read it to my husband.
valerie says
Kristen, thank you. This is me. I am the one stuck in a job I often hate – and I’ve been here for 20 years. Twenty. It’s not always the job itself I hate, but the fact that I have to work at all. For 15 years – since my daughter was born – it’s been the desire of my heart to be a stay-at-home mommy. God hasn’t allowed that yet (and no, I don’t work so that we can have a big house or cable TV or drive expensive cars – we live very modestly), and now we only have 3 years left with her. It breaks my heart to watch that time slip away. Most of the time I work really hard to stuff the desire as far down in my heart as it will go, just so that the longing for it doesn’t suffocate me. “Don’t think for a minute He has forgotten you either.” That statement is really hard for me. Sometimes it sure does feel like it. I work hard at being grateful and not grumbling, but for sure my dreams have long since been pushed far back on the shelf. Thank you for this reminder that my life is not about me, but that I am here for HIS glory and purpose.
Monica says
valerie, your comment really resonated with me as I am in a similar situation. my husband has be chronically ill for most of my children’s 12 years of life (twins). so i have been the breadwinner. it breaks our hearts that nothing in our lives has gone the way we wanted and imagined it would be (and we imagined very good things!) but, we can see that we’ve learned so much that we wouldn’t have otherwise. we are being molded in ways that are for our benefit. painful, literally yes. but good for our souls when we look for it. this life is only a step on the way to eternity. our real home awaits us, and that is where we’ll live even better than we ever could have imagined! the lord is good.
jenn@nahrstadt.com says
wow, did i need to hear that today. we’ve heard God and i’ve stepped away from my job at Starbucks, where i did indeed see Him use my discomfort to comfort and encourage others. we do not know what is next, but my husband told me i’d never find out what it is if i kept holding on to something that He’s no longer using. those were BIG faith words for him, and now that we are six weeks into that decision, we are learning more about relying on faith instead of ourselves.
thanks for sharing. God used in yet another way what He used in your lives for His glory.
Stephanie Naidoo says
Amen
Emily Roach says
thank you so much for this. We are in a similar position. Husband left the job he didn’t love seven years ago, and got the job he was made for, in ministry. It’s a changing position, which is great, but again, we are learning where God will have us serve. He is faithful, and oh so creative. His plans for us are so much better than we can derive on our own!
Stephanie S says
Thank you for this today. I’ve been looking for work closer to home so I can leave my 90min one-way commute behind me for just over 3 years. So far God hasn’t opened the doors closer to home, but I know he hasn’t forgotten about me either. Everyday I pray this will be the day the doors open and I get back at least 2 hours everyday with my family.
Adina @Royal Blessings says
My husband and I are also in a similar position. He is waiting for God’s leading elsewhere so he can leave a job he does not like. But this post is a great perspective that I never thought before. Thank you for sharing your heart.
Courtney says
Oh, these words were SO needed! I don’t hate my job or the people that I work with. God has blessed me in that arena. But I feel so unfulfilled, like an aching for something different or more. I feel like I’ve found a Filler Job instead of a Purpose Job and, quite frankly, it haunts me at times. Thanks for the beautiful reminder that God has me right where He wants me, He hasn’t forgotten me, and that my trust needs to be placed in Him.
Tiera says
This post is speaking our reality. My husband left his job to go into ministry 3 years ago. We have opened a bakery that exists to change our city for God’s kingdom. We are offering a volunteer job to anyone that has had a felony due to drug use in their past. We are offering a host of services to help them find a new direction in life and an fresh start. I still work the job that I often disdain. I feel very stuck and very unhappy quite a bit of the time. You see, this bakery is a dream job for me. I have loved to bake since I can remember, but I sit at a desk all day instead while my husband works and runs the bakery and helps the guys, “our clients”. I can’t see past tomorrow most days, but I know God has plans for us and I can’t wait to see what they actually are. God bless you and your family as you continue to strive to serve others through serving him. I know you are super busy, but it would be awesome if there was some way to have a conference of sorts for all of us that would love to meet you in person and pick your brain.
Carleen says
Thank You so much for this post!! Ever since stepping back from my education and career goals to take care of our family while my husband’s career has moved us literally all over the country in just four short years, I have struggled with what my purpose is. I knew my purpose was to be mom, to provide stability and comfort for my kids amongst all the moves, and to keep supporting and encouraging my husband as he worked so hard to move up and into a comfortable place in his field. This helps me to see all of my time on the sidelines with a purpose and reinforce that God still sees me too and is using this time to change and prepare me. And just in time for our final move(at least for a few years, ha!), our final baby about to be born, and as my husband steps into working for the federal agency he has had his sights on for so long. It feels like we are almost settled, which will allow a whole new adventure to unfold! Can’t wait and thank you for this encouraging post!!!
Whitney R says
Such a great post, Kristen. Thanks for sharing!
Gina says
What a beautiful post. I’m in the exact same position and it’s not easy but I know it’s time to prepare and let God do the rest!!! Bless you and your family 🙂
Dani says
Thank you for sharing your experience. The Lord taught me some time ago that He wastes nothing – neither time, opportunity or circumstances. He uses all for the good of His children and for His own glory.
I’ve been up and down, down and up mostly due to my own stubborness. I’m going through the trial of my life but I asked the Lord to do whatever it takes and when He did I rebelled. I had no idea of the DROSS that was in my heart. These trials have a way of exposing weaknesses and sin that nothing else does. But my rebellion came mostly because I have never had to rely on or depend on someone else for anything. The Lord has shown me much mercy and graciousness and has forgiven me much….and has shown me that He really does know best. But it has been hard for me to learn how to depend on Him alone after having been self-sufficient (or so I thought) all of my life.
I know what the plan is for He has shown it to me. The devil has been whispering sweet nothings in my ear trying to get me to distrust God’s provision and murmur against it. Through it all the Lord has been faithful to bring me to my senses and to help me keep my perspective though sometimes I allow my eyes to become fixated on my circumstances and lose my perspective. At any rate, it never occurred to me to offer my uncomfortable situation to God to use for someone else’s comfort. Thanks so much for this post.
Robert says
I have suffered all my life with learning problems and hand tremors ally life I have jobs that I just worked to support my family when do I get a job and be content I was once I had a job at major shipyard in VA that I loved and damed learning problems took that away so when does it stop
Gloria says
Do I have to put myself in an uncomfortable position for others not to sin?
Chrissy says
If you quit a job you hate in order to go serve in ministry, where does the money come from for your living expenses? Do you ask for donations because the main reason I can’t go do big things for God is because I have to work day in and day out to just survive financially. It really eats away at me every day because I feel like if it wasn’t for living expenses I could be doing something greater. I’m thinking about a career change which would provide a little more money but it still is not my dream job or anything but it’s something within my means to do with a little more education. I just feel so stuck with no hope that anything will change and I will probably be doing this job the rest of my life even though my heart burns to do something else. I feel defeated and hopeless for my future on this side of eternity and just want Jesus to come back and fix this entire earth mess because I can’t see things getting better any other way.
Gayle says
Wow.. You so feel like I did and still do from time to time., Although at this point God spoke to me that HE is showing me how to rest/ trust in HIM… I will keep you in prayer, stay before the lord❤️🙏🏽🥰
Gayle says
Thank you so much for the encouragement, somewhat my testimony. I had been on a job for 33 years at the same time was growing weary about doing something else, I just didn’t have it in me anymore, then I was terminated by an unfit manager, I cried for months after God told me he allowed it to happen., now I’m presently at home being restored, yes very uncomfortable, but my relationship with the Lord is and has been priceless. Again, Thank you for the encouragement going into my future pray fully in helping others🙏🏽❤️🥰
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