Children understand the assignment… parents don’t always know how to complete it!
Child-rearing is the practice of raising kids and providing for their needs.
But in this day and age, with so many challenges, how do we raise great kids? Raising anything is hard, but bringing up small humans is the ultimate challenge.
I’m a fairly new gardener, trying to raise baby plants, but between bouts of bad weather and bugs, I worry over my small seedlings like a new mother.
Worry is a weed in every parent’s garden; you are not alone. You can confidently raise great kids who can withstand the storms of life, reach for the sun and grow.
What Is Child-Rearing?
Simply put, it’s the process of training children. When it comes to raising kids, there are different styles.
Here are the four main types:
- Authoritarian-This type of parenting governs by rules and is generally fear-based. Punishment is usually the only way discipline is administered.
- Authoritative-Parents who choose this style seek to set a balance of behavioral expectations and are willing to work with their children through their challenges. Mistakes are often viewed as learning experiences.
- Permissive-Limits and behavioral guidelines are not established in this type of parenting. Permissive parents are not demanding, rather look at their child as an equal.
- Uninvolved-Parents leave decision-making to their children with limited communication
11 Child Rearing Practices, Techniques, and Strategies You Can Rely On
If you follow these proven child-rearing tips, you can rest assured these strategies will guide your parenting journey.
1. Establish authority
Parents set behavioral expectations because they can see what children cannot. Parents have the gift of wisdom and maturity. Children are motivated in the moment and lean on parents to look ahead to protect and provide for them. Being too permissive can lead a child to believe their parents might not care for their welfare.
2. Happiness is not the goal
Culture has elevated happiness as the ultimate goal in life. Being happy every moment of every day is impossible. When we do what is right for our kids, even if it means they are momentarily unhappy, we are preparing them for life. Life has disappointments and home is a safe place to experience them.
3. Discipline with consistency
Following through with rules you’ve established and consequences you’ve explained teaches children to respect authority, laws, teachers, and later, bosses outside of the home. If parents constantly let their kids off the hook or bail them out, they are inadvertently teaching them they can do whatever they want without consequences. Discipline is an expression of love. Grit is sheer determination to finish what is started. It takes strength to be consistent and do what you say you are going to do.
4. Grace has a place in parenting
Practicing patience and offering second chances will unlock some difficult-to-reach places in a child’s heart. Forgiveness is a parental act of love.
5. God is good
God created order. He set into motion cause and effect from the beginning of time. He protects people so He can provide for them There is order and when we go against it, there are consequences. Parents are the path that introduces children to God. Children can experience God’s love and goodness through the actions of their parents.
6. Life has a purpose
People are eternal beings. Despite striving and obtaining, you will leave this world with the same thing—nothing. You are created for eternity. The things of this world that are fun and feel good are temporary. Kids don’t always have the perspective of hindsight, so everything here and now feels like forever. Children need parents to gently remind them the world will never truly satisfy. Living a meaningful life will bring satisfaction.
7. Kindness matters
Raise children to see the needs of others. It’s easy for kids to see their own needs and make them known. But showing them how to care for other people also teaches them the world doesn’t revolve around their needs. Perspective is a gift parents can offer their children.
8. Choose your battles
Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing at all. When kids complain, whine, argue, pout and show poor behavior, It’s so easy to react to them. But often what they need is for their parent to respond. Responding can look like listening or offering a hug, When they complain or struggle, they don’t always need you to intervene. Learning to let the small stuff go is half the battle.
9. Child-rearing is leading and letting go
It is impossible to hold on and grasp tightly at the same time. From the time of birth, children grow and change. It’s unhealthy and unnatural for them to remain the same. Part of a parent’s ongoing job is guiding them through phases and stages. This process requires a constant, slow, letting go. It can be tempting to try and control situations along the way, but it isn’t healthy. The goal is to lovingly lead them into adulthood.
10. Be there
Kids want to know their parents are there for them–in the highs and lows. When they are vulnerable and show us their fears and failures, it’s usually isn’t so we can fix the difficult situation; it’s so that they don’t have to face it alone. You can be there without being everywhere. Friendship between parents and children is something to look forward to in the future.
11. Don’t give up
Child-rearing is hard. It takes guts to lead well and courage to do what is best for your kids even if it’s different from what others are doing. Mistakes will be made in your child-rearing: Acknowledge them, apologize if necessary, let them go, and keep trying.
You Can Do This
No one said child-rearing would be an easy assignment. There will be difficult seasons, tears, and fears along the way, but in the right environment, watered with love and concern, raising great kids is possible. Carefully tend your home and watch it grow.
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